


Written in Blood: Paper Moon

by Sakurafox666



Series: Written in Blood [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Fingering, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Begging, Blow Jobs, Dark Scott, Developing Relationship, Dom/sub, Dubious Consent, Edgeplay, Fisting, Hand Jobs, Knotting, M/M, Marking, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Pack Bonding, Power Dynamics, Rimming, Rough Sex, Submission
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-12
Updated: 2015-09-01
Packaged: 2018-04-04 01:27:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 29,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4121268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sakurafox666/pseuds/Sakurafox666
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Be careful what you chase after; false gods and paper moons trick even the most clever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT: This is a three part story, I strongly recommend reading Heart of Darkness before reading this arc of the story, otherwise several elements to Paper Moon will not make sense. Thank you.
> 
> Hey guys, welcome back! Thanks for all the positive feedback on Act 1, Heart of Darkness, it gave me the drive I needed to complete this next part. Hope it lives up to your expectations!
> 
> As always this story is beta'd by Stately_Demented, she's a wonderful beta and just fun to talk to in general! Go check out her work here: http://archiveofourown.org/users/Stately_Demented/pseuds/Stately_Demented
> 
> Artwork is by the most awesome Jubblier over on DeviantART and colored by me. Alright, on to the story.

* * *

Recovery was slow for his pack. Deucalion's arm and burns healed completely, although it took several sessions with the twins before he could move his arm around, let alone fight. Scott didn't lay a hand on him the entire time. An irking sense of respect—maybe something more—kept him from taking advantage of the injured man, or perhaps because the fight had left his eyes. In private moments, Scott remembered Deucalion saving him from that hunter, of the older man curling closer to him when injured and that something could develop from that...but the thought was crushed by darkness every time.

Even left untouched, issues still arose with Deucalion. He started having nightmares that flashed back to when his eyes were taken, thrashing in his sleep and waking in a panic-covered sweat. It grated on Scott's nerves, frayed at the edges of the control he tried to leash his temper with. Afraid he would lash out and worsen the situation, he sent Deucalion to the twins. When it didn't get better he made his way to Derek's room.

"You're his alpha," Derek explained with a shrug. Scott laid away from him, in every respect, pouting. At Derek's continued silence, he turned and shot his beta a look. The older boy sighed and continued, "He considers himself yours since you marked him, he  _has_  to. The twins can only do so much, you're the only one who's going to really be able to make a difference."

"It's not like I can heal him," Scott spat back, having learned that little tidbit from Deucalion months ago. The rest of his pack could take away people's pain, but he and Deucalion could not anymore. Something to do with the darkness that tainted them both, Scott was sure of it, although, too much of a coward to try and reflect upon what had happened the night of his change. He could feel it on his skin however, like a stain that never washed off.

"You don't have to take away his pain," Derek said and placed a hand at the base of Scott's back. "Even a simple touch can comfort someone." But Scott stayed stubborn, unrelenting until he awoke one night to Deucalion's hushed crying. And it  _was_  quiet, a human wouldn't have been able to hear it, but Scott could and it was like shards of glass scraping along his skull. Hot rage burned at the pit of his stomach from that pain, darkness stealing away into his chest and pushing poisonous words past harsh lips.

"I  _thought_  we were past this." Scott ran a hand over his face, trying to calm down. It wasn't Deucalion's fault, he couldn't control the nightmares. "Just go to the twins—"

"No, wait." Deucalion forced himself to quiet down and covered his eyes. "I'm sorry, I'll try to be more quiet. I thought—I can do this. Don't send me away."

It didn't make sense why he wanted to stay and it hurt to try and think on it. Scott snarled and stood up. Deucalion winced and folded in on himself, bracing for a blow. His shoulder, although healed, retained an interesting scar that looked a bit like shattered glass. Scott shook his head and tried to shake  _more_  than that. All the hatred and fury that crashed through him and made it deflate, too tired to keep arguing. He sat abruptly on the floor and shoved at Deucalion until he had his back to him.

"Just...go to sleep," Scott said and placed a hand on Deucalion's back, in the center where the tattoo of his old pack's symbol was. The man froze at the touch, slowly letting a breath out as he realized what Scott was doing.

"Scott?" Deucalion always tested Scott by saying his name, wanting to know if he was dealing with the boy or the monster. At Scott's lack of reaction the man shifted slightly, looking over his shoulder with red eyes. "It'd be more comfortable to get into the bed—"

"Don't push it," Scott warned, "I'm—" Close to his limit as it was, but it felt weak to admit. He willed Deucalion to understand the effort this was costing him, holding his darkness back to show a kindness. "Just go back to sleep," he repeated. Deucalion took the hint and stayed with his back to Scott. Relaxing after another few minutes and then, drifting off to sleep. Scott followed a few minutes later, head pillowed on his other arm, he rested on the bed. Darkness still flickered at the edges of his mind, but sleep dulled it and the two stayed silent the rest of the night. Deucalion suffered no more nightmares.

Scott awoke gradually drawn by a deep rumble of thunder through the fog. The sound of a smooth baritone, feather-like touches to his cheek reminded him of rain and for a moment Scott was in a forest, eyes closed and smile on his face. It felt like home.

"...Scott?"

Needles raced up his arm and Scott jerked awake. He felt more than saw Deucalion rip his hand away from Scott, face drawn tight in—concern? Scott blinked and the look was gone, instead Deucalion just seemed wary, which was fairly normal and the younger man heaved a sigh.

" _Alpha?_ " Deucalion asked quietly, like he was stepping around glass.

"Was that you?" Scott asked. "Calling me awake?"

"I—yes. You weren't waking up." The older man's heartbeat increased slightly, his eyes faded to a glazed blue.

"That was your voice?" Which was a stupid question because who else's voice would Scott have heard. He shook his head. "Sorry, it just sounded—" He stopped himself from saying nice. It just didn't feel right. Awkwardness settled over the silence and Scott ignored the pain shooting through his left arm falling asleep on him.

"Thank you," Deucalion whispered, eyes still blind and face turned away from Scott. The white knuckle grip in the sheets and his ever increasing heartbeat gave away his nervousness. Or maybe it was just flat out fear of Scott lashing out, given their history. For the first time he felt this intense guilt.

The heavy quiet settled around Scott. More than the quiet he felt the flare of his temper and knew there wasn't much time left. He was unused to gratitude to say the least. It weighed on his mind, much like a pressure that pushed him to do more. It felt like a part of him that should be dead.

"I'm—" Deucalion tried to speak, his soft voice cracking, "I don't know anymore."

Scott frowned, confused. "About what?" Deucalion's shoulders slumped and he turned his head back towards Scott, sightless eyes fixed to the floor.

"You."

It was a word that held so many possibilities and meanings. Scott stared, unable to do anything else but try and process. His skin felt burnt, his heart pounded against his chest, and he couldn't get himself to care if Deucalion heard. It wasn't an admission of love or even liking him, but it meant something. To Scott, at least.

When the darkness broke through his lowered defenses, Scott didn't lash out. Instead, his violent urges focused inwards, tearing him down with bitter thoughts of self-loathing and hate. Deucalion was just trying to please him, to save himself from Scott. None of it meant anything. An ugly pain twisted around Scott's spine up the nape of his neck and whispered the truth; he was alone.

Scott swallowed, throat dry, and felt his hope flicker and die.

"It doesn't matter."

* * *

 

They left the country as soon as Deucalion was well enough to travel. Scott's plan worked perfectly; hunters who tried to follow his pack were killed with little effort. He used the advantage of the hunters' inability to move quickly in large groups with great success. Scott let Kali take the lead in eradicating their pursuers; she and the twins, with their raw strength, were able to handle most situations so by the time they got to England, there were no humans left chasing them.

Scott pushed to go further north, unsatisfied with the cities of southern Britain, until they reached Scotland. Research from various sources he had been scouring, as well as Deucalion's own knowledge, showed little hunter activity in that area. A larger city was picked, one that was a common tourist site, before finally settling. They rented out a house and struggled to lay low for the first time since starting out. Scott locked himself away in the first initial months, and felt like he was going insane. Being caged was a first for Scott. He became increasingly agitated and restless as echoes of darkness crept into his mind. He tried focusing on fully controlling himself but his pack's first heat got in the way.

It started one morning when Scott woke up, blinking as patterns of sunlight danced through his blinds. He and Deucalion still shared a room, but not beds, and when Scott awoke, it was to the sound of the other man whining. He felt the bubble of frustration swell in his chest and clenched his jaw, believing Deucalion had finally gotten over his nightmares weeks ago—only for his thoughts to completely derail as he became overwhelmed by a scent; a concentrated aroma of lust. Scott felt his stomach twist at the sensation.

"God, it's too early in the morning," he complained as he stumbled out of bed. Deucalion was turned away from him, probably realizing Scott was not in the mood. The boy repressed a sigh and left the room, snapping the door shut, and yelping as Kali nearly ran over him emitting the same scent. " _What the hell?_ " Scott growled, voice stopping the woman dead in her tracks and she was forced to lean against the wall for support, legs trembling. Scott finally started to pay attention to what was happening around him, heightening his senses and growing concerned. "Um, are you alright?" He reached out to touch her and she actually let him, which surprised Scott more than anything. Kali never let  _anyone_  touch her.

The she-alpha let out a shaky breath, her scent cloying. Scott broke out into a sweat. He'd never smelled her arousal before and it assaulted his senses.

"It's fine, Alpha," she breathed out, shaking off his hand and pulling her overcoat around herself more securely. With his heightened eyesight, Scott could tell she wore nothing underneath. "Just the heat. I'm going out to find a human, is that alright?" The fact she was even asking his permission sent off more alarm bells. He stepped closer to her and Kali started to tremble with that scent rolling off her. She pushed a hand at his chest and glared, although desire was still in her eyes. "Alpha, if you want me then take me right now."

Scott gaped and hastily stepped back, almost tripping over himself and he reached for the wall. "Um—what? N-No, it's ok. G-Go find a human, it's fine. Uh—same rules as usual."

She nodded and practically dashed out of the house, leaving a dumbfounded Scott in her wake. Kali had never even looked at him like that, let alone offered to have sex. Scott tilted his head, contemplating if this was a female werewolf thing and went over to Derek's room to ask. He pushed open the door and gave an exasperated yell as the same scent hit him.

"Alright,  _what_  the hell?" Scott asked aggressively. Derek jerked away from his bed, coughing nervously, starting to sweat. He looked torn between moving closer to his alpha or staying where he was. His pounding heart and his scent told Scott enough. "I swear to God if you tell me to take you right here and now, I'm going to lose it."

"Uh—" Derek gave a full-body shudder and awkwardly stepped closer to Scott, trembling hands shoved into his pockets before he changed his mind and quickly turned around. "I mean—if-if you want..." His voice grew low with coy excitement, but cracked at the end and Scott could tell how uneasy he was. Derek paced around the room, shooting Scott conflicted looks of longing and lust, but refused to say anything, face bright red. It got annoying fast.

"You know what? It can wait." Scott pointed to the door. "Go find a human and work this out of your system,  _now_." Derek raced out the door, although not before making an odd whine and brushing his entire body up against Scott's, letting the younger alpha feel his half-hard erection. Scott sighed and pushed him away, not even attempting to open up Aiden and Ethan's room.

"If you two are as jacked up on sexual energy as everyone else, leave!" Two lust-filled barks answered back and Scott resisted the urge to punch something, heading back to his room and planning to kick Deucalion out so he could find a human as well. Later tonight, when someone was sensible, he was going to get answers.

"Hey," Scott announced as he opened his door, "go out and—" He was cut off as Deucalion attacked his mouth, pressing tight against Scott and letting out a whimper. In all of their time together this was the first time he had demanded anything from his alpha. It was like being split in half, torn asunder as within that single moment, a small part of Scott  _wanted_. Desperate and fleeting, he nonetheless felt his eyes start to close as he was truly kissed for the first time since Allison. It was in that fragile instant that darkness rushed forth, consumed him, and Scott felt a scream tear itself from his throat.

He threw Deucalion off him with a snarl as a wild fury coursed through his blood, unstoppable. He ducked low and barreled into the older man, knocking the wind from him. As they slammed into the ground, Scott felt his arm move by itself and crashed his fist against Deucalion's face for even touching him at all, followed by savagely biting down on his neck for the kiss. The man groaned, but in pleasure rather than pain, thrusting his hips up against Scott's. Hands grabbed a hold of the boy's waist and ground against him. Scott yelped and leapt back, irritated and confused.

"What the hell is  _wrong_  with you!?" he yelled, almost suffocating as he struggled against the warring emotions inside himself. Deucalion didn't respond, but got up again and made for him. Scott lost his patience for an answer and struck out, palm connecting with the other wolf's ribs and a crack sounded. Deucalion fell to his knees, finally grunting in pain, but he remained hard and his scent only grew stronger.

Which is how Scott ended up sitting out on his own roof the entire day sulking.

The only one of his wolves to return to the den with a human was Derek, leading a beautiful woman with auburn hair and just a hint of wrinkles along her eyes, pausing frequently to kiss her in the street. She didn't complain.

Scott blinked and frowned. Derek had a thing for older women,  _right_. Memories of Kate and Jennifer ran through his mind and Scott shuddered, turning his thoughts elsewhere as he waited for the day to pass.

It wasn't until night fell that Kali finally returned home. Her heels clicked sharply along the pavement, shadow defined against the bright moonlight, but stopped short when she saw Scott. He gave a lame wave and continued brooding, playing with a spare wolfsbane bullet he had kept after the hunter attack. Derek had given it to him, citing it as a token of luck and a precaution.

After a few minutes of waiting, Kali appeared on the roof to join him, thankfully dressed in her casual indoor clothes. Her scent was still strong, but not near the potency it had been earlier.

"First heat, I take it?" She rolled her eyes at Scott's huff that he'd picked up from his wolf form. He pocketed the bullet. "I'll answer what I can."

"Cool, so...what the  _fuck?_ " Scott could have been more eloquent, but he chose not to be. Of course using the word 'fuck' probably wasn't a good idea as Kali shivered at his voice and Scott quickly scooted back in alarm.

"Relax, Alpha." She sighed, running a hand through her hair. "I really  _don't_  want to mate with you, no offense."

"Same here," Scott assured her.

"Listen, packs go into heat about once every year," Kali began, "Sometimes more, sometimes less. It's like the weather; a bit unpredictable. With us fighting and moving so much last year I wasn't surprised when nothing happened. Now that we've settled down a bit, it'll start to regulate."

" _Oh god_." Scott could feel the ache start in the back of his head.

"What you've done today is pretty much what most modern alphas do," Kali admitted. "Originally during a heat the alpha would go to each pack member and give them release—" Scott must have made a face, because Kali started to laugh "—but that's not so mainstream anymore. All the alphas I've been under have let their pack go off and pick up humans, or other wolves, to deal with their desires. For years I've had Ennis, this was the first time I had to go out and find a human again." She paused. "Actually it was pretty good, I haven't been with a woman in about a decade."

"How long does it last?" Scott asked.

"Oh, the worst of it is just a day so long as our needs are met." Kali twirled her hair with a finger. "Just don't be surprised if we're a bit twitchy over the next few days and keep coming up to talk. We'll be drawn to our alpha until the heat leaves our system."

"What should I do about Deucalion, then?" Scott demanded. "He won't go out and look for anybody else! He's just been in my room waiting for me to return. Even when I hurt him he still kept coming. H-He—" Scott wasn't sure how much to tell Kali, as they weren't particularly close. He generally wasn't open with the rest of his pack outside of Derek.

"Of course he won't leave." Kali gave him a puzzled look. "He's  _yours_. He considers himself yours since you marked him. Deucalion is very mired in the older ways of wolf lore. He won't go out and seek anyone except his alpha—I don't even think he can."

"Great..." Scott sighed, ugly feelings tried to arise in him and he pushed them down. When Deucalion had kissed him, too much happened. Too many emotions had crowded against him and it had hurt. He was scared to face that again.

"What's the problem? You fuck him all the time."

"It's not that," the younger alpha disclosed quietly. He didn't trusted Kali, but Scott needed someone to talk to and Derek wasn't here. "It's that he kept trying to touch me, t-to make it intimate. He probably doesn't have any control right now, but...I can't stand being touched." It felt weird admitting to someone at last and he never would have thought it'd be Kali. He left out the part about being scared, about actually wanting intimacy but being unable to attain it anymore thanks to this darkness. He didn't want to appear too weak. The woman next to him frowned, turning her head away in thought.

"Huh, strange," she hummed. "I'm the same way." Both alphas looked at each other in a new light. "Yeah, I can't stand when people try to touch me, it's why I have to be on top. Ennis understood somewhat, he never argued about it anyways."

"I wasn't always like this," Scott continued, opening up just a bit more. "But ever since—" and he gestured to his whole body "—it just doesn't seem right."

"I understand," Kali said, whether she truly did or not Scott couldn't tell. The woman rolled her eyes at Scott's continued brooding and looked off to the side, thinking. "Just use your voice with Deucalion, we can't disobey orders while in heat. If you command him not to touch you, he can't. It'll be tough on him, but you can get everything done and it'll ease his heat to a bearable level."

"Mmm." Scott leaned back against the roof, looking up at the night sky. The stars always appeared still and calm, he wished it would be the same for him. "Why am  _I_  not really feeling any of this?"

"Probably because of who you are." At Scott's raised eyebrow, Kali shook her head and gave an exasperated sigh. "You're our alpha. It'd be pretty stupid if the alpha were incapacitated as well during this."

"Good point." The two shared a companionable silence for a long time after that. Scott figured in part due to the fact that Kali was drawn to him right now, but he still liked it nonetheless. Besides Derek, Kali had never given him trouble for his decisions or judged him. "Thanks Kali," he said, hopping back up. "Better go deal with the stubborn wolf now."

Deucalion was still waiting in his room, body taunt with want and arousal, sitting on Scott's bed, head in hands, erection straining dark red between his legs. The older wolf snapped to attention when Scott entered the room, rushing to the young alpha.

"STOP," Scott ordered and just like Kali had said, Deucalion stopped a foot away, not moving, although his body strained against the imposed space restriction.

" _Please_ ," the man begged. His skin was flushed and sweaty from constant stimulation, precome dripped from his cock just from being in Scott's proximity. His voice and the rough quality added to it in arousal, made Scott shiver. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to calm his heartbeat, body on the brink of an emotional collapse. Like murky water that hid deadly churning underneath, Scott knew he needed to do this as fast and detached as possible if he wanted to keep his sanity—what was left of it anyways.

Scott took a deep breath and immediately realized that being this close to Deucalion in heat, as his scent slammed through Scott, was a mistake. For a moment Scott began to panic until he realized what was happening. The darkness was...fading?

Like a tidal wave, as the scent of the heat washed over him, his temper was pushed further to the back of his mind. Scott inhaled again, a little stunned as he felt himself relax for the first time in over a year. This was—he was  _himself_. Scott grit his teeth and tried not to cry. The relief and happiness within him was almost too much.

" _Alpha?_ " Scott was pulled back to reality. Deucalion's eyes were wild with raw lust and hunger, but vulnerable too. Scott could pick out fear lurking in his bright red eyes, always there, always wary. He wanted Scott now more than ever before, but it was still forced upon him and he was terrified of how Scott could use it against him. If what Kali had said was true, he could make Deucalion do anything. The man trembled in front of him, both in desire and dread. It reminded Scott of that first night...

...but he could be  _different_  right now.

Scott finally smiled and pushed against Deucalion, backing him up against the wall until their bodies were flush against each other. Deucalion gasped at the contact, tilting his head to the side, displaying his neck. Scott reached out with his hands to caress down Deucalion's collarbone, human fingernails scraping gently across the skin. Scott felt the call of the heat push harder against him, felt the darkness fade even more and at last, brought his lips to Deucalion's neck. He mouthed at the flesh, almost kissing it, teeth and tongue scraping and tasting sweat and a spice that was all Deucalion. Scott's smile widened and he lavished the skin underneath him, covering himself in Deucalion's scent and taste; relishing in the familiarity of his body and the sense of security it seemed to radiate.

Deucalion finally moaned loudly and Scott slid his hand down to start pleasuring him, slow and firm strokes with just a hint of his nails. Deucalion shuddered and choked back another groan, clearly fighting against the urge to curl closer to Scott.

"Wh-what are—" Scott pulled back just enough to glance up at Deucalion. The older man's eyes were a bright red, torn with several different emotions, but confusion being at the forefront. Scott couldn't blame him; he was being gentle and that was a side of him Deucalion had never really experienced before. " _Scott?_ " The name was torn from Deucalion's throat as the boy sped up his strokes. Scott leaned up close to Deucalion, teeth scraping teasingly at his earlobe.

"What do you want?" he whispered. He could order Deucalion to do anything right now,  _anything_. But Scott's mind was free and instead, he wished only one thing. "Tell me how I can help." Deucalion opened his mouth but didn't answer, or couldn't seem to figure out how. Scott's free hand cupped his cheek and he busied his mouth kissing Deucalion's neck again, waiting for a response. He sunk his teeth into the flesh just hard enough to leave indents and Deucalion whimpered, hips thrusting against Scott.

"I don't understand..." It drew Scott out of the moment and he stopped what he was doing. Deucalion whined at the loss, but as Scott studied him, he saw how stunned the man really was. He had fully expected Scott to use the heat against him, or to abuse him, or simply ignore him. Deucalion had probably expected Scott to do hundreds of other things except what he was currently doing. He wasn't used to Scott being kind.

Scott's body moved on it's own; he grabbed both of Deucalion's legs and hauled him up, grinding on him in such a way that had the older man crying out in ragged desire as his body spasmed in pleasure and he clutched at Scott's back out of reflex. He flinched, waiting for Scott to strike him at the intimate touch, but froze as nothing happened—as he was allowed to touch for once. Scott thrust against him, lips traveling up his body until they met his throat and then he trailed kisses along Deucalion's jaw and their foreheads were pressed against each other.

"Scott?" Deucalion asked again, gaze sharpening in realization.

"Hey," Scott responded and thrust again, making Deucalion whine and fold in on himself, head falling to Scott's neck. "Heat's keeping me sane right now," he explained quickly, wincing as the darkness lashed out at him. His temper beckoned and Scott shrugged it off, nipping at the offered neck in front of him instead. "Now tell me what you need." Deucalion's breath came out harshly against Scott's neck and he felt a wetness against his shirt collar, but ignored it.

"Just fuck me," Deucalion muttered at last, fingers digging into Scott's back as he started meeting him thrust for thrust. "I want this to be over."

Scott didn't know what he had expected, but he didn't think it would hurt to hear those words. Deucalion still didn't trust or want to be intimate with him, but he was desperate enough to play along with Scott right now. Part of the boy recoiled; he'd thought that maybe...just maybe, things had been changing between the two of them.

That had been stupid on his part. Deucalion wasn't his by choice and probably didn't want to do this; he had to, he didn't have an alternative; his body was making him act this way to Scott. The darkness called again, reminding Scott he was alone. It pushed to be let back in. Scott shook his head and pulled back, releasing Deucalion and letting him stand again.

He gave his best devil-may-care grin. "I can do that." He didn't let the pain show. Deucalion seemed at a loss again, like he had been expecting a different reaction, but Scott dragged him over to the bed. He let Deucalion lay on the bed, back to Scott, before grabbing his hips and grinding teasingly against him. Deucalion dropped his head against the sheets, whining in anticipation as Scott undid his jeans. He noted some slickness around Deucalion's entrance and swiped a finger over it, making the other man buckle and choke out a groan.

"Did you already prepare yourself?" Scott asked and received a heated nod. More guilt crashed into him, imagining Deucalion waiting in this room by himself unable to find relief. The building hormones in his body, clamoring to peak and the increase of fear at what Scott would do to him. Maybe he had even been hoping Scott would ignore him. Darkness flashed through his mind, blinding him momentarily with pain and Scott pressed his palm to his head. He must have made a noise because Deucalion stilled underneath him.

"Scott—"

"It's cool, we're good." He couldn't let his pain show. This was for Deucalion, not himself. Scott steeled his mind and quickly slid into Deucalion. The man gasped and immediately shoved himself back down further onto Scott, growling and demanding more. Scott thrust in as fast as he could, unsure if he should give the other time to adjust. Deucalion didn't seem to care as he took everything Scott had, moaning filthily and pushing back eagerly.

" _This_. Just more of this," Deucalion gasped, voice catching in his throat at each thrust.

Scott reached forward and pinned Deucalion's head down with one hand, fingers sliding through coarse bronze hair and pounded relentlessly against his body. He wanted more. He knew that now, it's what he always craved. The darkness actually protected him from these feelings because it could never happen. This was as close as he and Deucalion were ever going to get. Scott shook his head, this was no time for tears.

Deucalion writhed underneath him in pleasure, begging for more. Scott knew what he needed, what his body craved and pulled Deucalion up by his hair, in a way he knew it wouldn't hurt, and bit at his neck.

"Do you want to touch yourself?" Scott egged him on, careful not to order Deucalion. He continued to slam against the older man, his remaining hand on Deucalion's hip switching to circle around his waist. "You know you can, right? You said you wanted this to be over." Deucalion's fangs extended in excitement as he jerked against Scott, a hand coming up to stroke himself hurriedly in time with Scott's movements. It didn't last long with that much stimulation. Deucalion clenched around Scott and the boy watched as he released, come coating his hand as he felt the low whine vibrate against him.

Scott quickly pulled out, knowing Deucalion was oversensitive but—

" _Don't stop_."

Scott halted his movements and looked over at his bedmate. Deucalion's body was drenched in sweat, hair covering his eyes, but Scott realized his hand hadn't left his cock and he was still touching himself. His scent was as potent as ever and the young man realized that they were far from over. Apparently, Deucalion didn't get over-stimulated during a heat. Good to know.

" _Please_..." He didn't like how Deucalion begged and Scott jumped forward, lining himself up and sliding back into the older man.

"You don't have to beg," he said before he shushed the man and started up a fast pace again. Deucalion's face twisted, as if he realized something about Scott's words, but it quickly crumbled to desire as the heat consumed him again and he pushed back against Scott's thrusts. "Just tell me what you want," Scott reiterated.

"Say I'm yours."

"I—" Alright, Scott hadn't expected Deucalion to say that. This was the heat talking, of course. It had to be. Scott nodded and let his eyes glow a bright crimson, growling the words, " _Mine_." Deucalion shuddered violently, almost coming undone just from that. It confirmed for Scott that it was just something any submissive wolf in heat wanted to hear.

It continued for several more hours until the heat left Deucalion's body and his scent started to wane. Scott collapsed next to him, breathing hard. The fact that he had finally managed to do something right caused a small smile to come to his face.

"Are you ok?" he asked quietly. Deucalion answered with a low groan, but there was no pain in his voice and Scott took that as an affirmative. He struggled to sit up and glanced over the other man's body, happy to see no bruises or blood besides where his neck had been marked. Scott took a deep breath and was relieved that the cloying scent was finally dying. Which meant—

Scott almost blacked out from the pain as darkness completely engulfed him, so sudden that he nearly didn't realize what was happening. It was as if every area of his mind had spikes being driven through it, needles dripped in acid pounded into his skull and Scott fell back against the bed. A soft whimper escaped him. The pain was numbing and Scott curled up on himself, clutching at his temples. An ugly aftereffect of the heat; where before his hormones had been blocking his temper now nothing was left to contain it.

"Scott...I wanted—"

Deucalion started to saying something and Scott could feel as all the darkness and rage shifted to focus on the man next to him and he panicked. He couldn't let this happen. Deucalion didn't deserve his temper and with the heat still in his system, Scott could make him suffer in even worse ways than before, could order him to hurt himself.  _No_.

Scott threw himself out of bed and tumbled to the floor. He needed to leave this house, he needed to get away from people. He didn't want to hurt anyone and in this state, he'd lash out at even Derek.

"Scott?" The boy turned and snarled, the name grating on his already abused mind and Deucalion recoiled away, back to the bed. Scott saw the fear flood into his red eyes. " _Alpha?_ " Scott's body stood and started to stalk forward, power and anger coiled and ready to unleash.

He couldn't make it out of the house, didn't have the willpower to move that much so Scott did the only thing he could. His claws slid out and Scott buried them deep in his arm, underneath his tattoo until blood was steadily dripping to the floor. It pulled him away from the pain in his head, long enough to drag himself over to the bathroom and slam the door shut, lock it and crawl into the bathtub.

His anger and darkness could rage out all it wanted in here. It wracked his body with pain until he had screamed himself horse. But Scott didn't care. He couldn't hurt anyone here. True he was strong enough to rip the door off its hinges, any of his wolves could, but he was in too much pain to move with nothing to direct his temper at and the others would be too scared to check on him...he hoped. Scott jerked as another wave of pain washed over him and he contemplated the worth of being himself for a few hours again if this was the cost.

Visions of his pack and old friends swarmed his mind, of their disgust and loathing over what he was now. He was alone, always. There would be no escape from this. Scott blinked and realized he had started crying. It would have to be worth it, he decided. If he could choose to be kind, even once, then this pain was worth it. He shivered against the cold, white porcelain of the bathtub and tried to ignore the screams in his mind and the pain in his body.

It turned out that his punishment wasn't just a one day ordeal. For his brief hours of freedom, Scott suffered days of increased darkness, blotting out most rational thought. His temper would flare at the slightest thing and even though he was able to leave the bathroom after several hours of hiding in fear, he could not stay at the house. For the rest of the heat he would be untouchable and vicious and generally left as soon as he could, until he had calmed down enough that he deemed himself safe. It was a horrible price to pay and it hurt his pack to not be around their alpha the one time they needed him, but the alternative was far worse.

As Kali had suggested, their heats normalized and about every eleven months, Scott would wake up to a certain scent saturating his house. At first, it was relieving that he was released from his internal prison and he practically threw himself at Deucalion, pleasuring the older man until he was on the brink of collapse and he saw the other completely satisfied. Then, before any words could be exchanged, Scott would lock himself in the bathroom to wait out the worst of the pain before he could muster the strength needed to flee their den. Derek would always return to the house while Kali would disappear for almost as long as Scott, probably considering the house not worthy of her attention if their alpha wasn't present. The twins would leave to find humans, but always came back the next day to check on Deucalion. Scott would stay far away, forced to deal with his own frayed emotions threatening to bubble over and he avoided his pack the rest of the week.

When Scott finally returned, tensions would be high and he could sense the strain it put on his pack, but no one ever tried to convince him to stay. They realized he left only for their own good.

After the first heat, when Scott walked back up to his room, he expected Deucalion to act coldly towards him, knowing he had been uncomfortable the entire time during the heat. Instead, he would never forget that when he opened the door Deucalion had been sitting by the desk, fingers tracing over brail, reading a book, but at Scott's scent, he had flinched so hard that it startled the boy. Trying to be kind had been pointless, if anything it had made their relationship worse. Scott had slumped and dropped down on his bed, turning away from Deucalion as the hope that he could ever be more than this died inside of him.

"Are you still in pain?" Scott almost thought he had imagined Deucalion asking that it had been said so softly. Scott bit his bottom lip and squeezed his eyes shut. He told the truth.

"I'm always in pain."

"I—" If Deucalion had been trying to apologize, Scott was glad he didn't. He shouldn't be sorry, Scott deserved this. " _Thank you_."

This time when Deucalion said those words, he sounded like he meant it. His voice was hoarse with honesty and it touched something deep inside Scott's chest. He stayed with his back to Deucalion but it was a close thing, in that moment he desperately wanted to connect. Instead he imagined Allison's hand holding his and he clenched his fists until the skin turned white.

"I wished I could have done more," he admitted, his voice just as broken.

Silence, and then, "You did enough."

It was tough and brutal on him, but system worked and Scott eventually grew accustomed to it.

* * *

 

The pack integrated quickly into the city; most of them getting jobs, not for the money, but to alleviate the boredom of staying so long in one place. Kali was the only one that refused, but Scott didn't argue as she always seemed to be busy anyways. He found a local veterinary's office short on staff and offered to help. Animals would always shy away from him, but were never aggressive and his coworkers praised his knowledge and patience, especially with dogs. His lab coat and supplies were kept at the office but he brought his notes home to go over and found comfort in the familiar data.

Around the house he noticed the twins' construction equipment piled up at the front door, hard hats hung from the coat hooks, and plans for the buildings they restored scattered across the kitchen table. The two seemed happy with the simple but hard labor.

Deucalion found employment at the city library and the books that covered the desk in their room he was translating to brail. His staff badge was always on their nightstand.

The twins and Kali didn't seem taken aback by his choice of service and Scott wondered if this was something from his old life, but it felt too personal to ask. Although one day when he came home, Scott found several of his favorite novels lying on his pillow. He was so caught off guard by the kind gesture he almost thought they were gifts from Derek until the older boy told him otherwise. Scott wanted to ask Deucalion why, but fear and self-doubt got the best of him and he remained silent. He brushed a hand across a copy of  _Heart of Darkness_  and wondered not for the first time about his own shadows and what Deucalion was trying to tell him, but pushed it out of his mind.

Most surprising was when he found police files pinned up across the living room walls and discovered Derek had offered his skills to the police, posing as an expert tracker. Scott guessed it had more to do with Derek's deep need to solve things, like his family's murder for example, that drove this particular instinct rather than goodwill. But it didn't matter because they now had an insider within the police force and could keep an ear out for suspicious murders.

Scott didn't trust that they were fully safe, that nothing else would lurk in from the outside to attack his pack. If Beacon Hills had taught him anything, it was to pay attention to the crime and unsolved murders within a city. Part in paranoia, Scott had Derek use his position to look up cold case files. Hunter activity was low in their city, but he could never be sure about the supernatural world. Even after nothing turned up, Scott still had Derek keep checking for anything unnatural.

He and Deucalion...continued their troubled relationship. Where before, after Scott had first been able to transform, he had been hopeful that he could see the signs of change in Deucalion's behavior towards him, but now it was much less clear. It frustrated Scott that as he tried to control himself more Deucalion only appeared to retreat further from him, spending great lengths of time at the library or with the twins while at home—but maybe it was just because Scott had finally given him the option.

At the beginning of their stay, after the first heat, Deucalion had become more subdued and stopped challenging Scott all together. He didn't resist any of Scott's advances, stopped talking altogether. The boy had worried at first and backed off, trying to show Deucalion he didn't want to hurt him anymore, that he was trying  _so_  hard. It only made the older man upset and he finally started rebuking Scott. It almost made him snap, pushed Scott so close to the edge and threatened the small bits of his reclaimed sanity that he tried to run. Deucalion blocked his path to the door.

"Stop this!" Scott clutched at his head as searing pain clawed at him. "Do you  _want_  me to hurt you?"

"It's who you are," Deucalion replied, eyes a blood red behind his glasses. A part of Scott thought they looked desperate. "Not this false boy you pretend to be, the kindness you try to act out." It felt like he'd been slapped and Scott's throat tightened. His claws forced their way through the skin of his fingers and his fangs grew. "See? This is the real you, Alpha."

Scott didn't understand why Deucalion was doing this. Why now? He searched the man's face, wanting to find a clue— _any_  clue. "You think I can fake what happens during the heat?  _Can you?_ " he spat out and for just a moment, he saw doubt cross Deucalion's face. It disappeared in an instant and instead the man turned his head away and snarled in defiance, body braced for a fight. Scott lunged forward, his claws sunk deep into the wood of the door behind Deucalion as he pinned the man against it. Fire shot through his veins and burned his entire body and Scott realized he was trembling from the pain.

" _Attack me_." Deucalion tried to make it a command, but it sounded like a plea, and somehow Scott managed to figure out the answer in a haze of pain. He smiled instead, strained but genuine.

"You're testing me." His voice came out like a sob even through his grin. "You hate me that much?" Scott was a little awed that Deucalion would be stubborn enough risk his life, risk everything, because he refused to believe a person could change. But, if Scott's sin was wrath then Deucalion's was pride, he'd always known that.

"I—" But Scott had seen through the charade now and forced the darkness back, pulled himself back together from the brink and collapsed on the floor. Or tried to, but Deucalion grabbed his shoulders and caught him. Scott heard his heartbeat and could tell Deucalion was frustrated enough to make his breathing erratic. "This is just a  _lie_. People do not change."

"I'm not a very good actor," Scott muttered against Deucalion's chest, the pain sapping all of his energy. "But if it feels better to hate me, that's ok. I'm the monster, remember? I just—I  _want_  to stop hurting people. Even if people can't change, I can try." Deucalion slowly slid to the floor, taking Scott with him and they sat like that for hours. The pain eventually dulled to a distant throbbing and Scott let out a slow sigh of relief.

"There are many types of monsters out there."

Scott blinked and lifted his head. Deucalion was turned away from him but his body was limp, face defeated. "Do you believe me?" he asked. Deucalion's jaw clenched and Scott started to pull back until a hand caught his arm.

"I don't know what I believe anymore." Deucalion looked just as lost as Scott felt. "But I guess I still don't know what to think about you either."

"That makes two of us," Scott agreed and winced as his temper flared. Deucalion let go of his arm, but didn't try to move away. Scott didn't have the energy to hope for more, but he accepted things as they were.

That was their life for three years. Scott kept careful tabs on the world around them, doing research on all the wolf packs he could get information on, watching the ebb and flow of power, managing a job and his wolves, working around heats and arguments. It...well, it almost felt like having a family again and without Scott's notice, the darkness receded slightly in his mind: stabilizing his mentality and letting him relax.

Deucalion returned to a sort of normal behavior; not fully submitting to Scott but the resistance in him changed. Instead of anger in his eyes there was more of a challenge, a spark that grew brighter when Scott responded to it. Although most of their interactions remained the same, Scott noticed that more occasionally, especially during a heat, Deucalion would ask to be called  _his_.

It was nice.

At least until he heard about the white wolf.

"It's a rumor," Kali was the first to tell Scott after he tracked down each pack member individually to question them. "He doesn't really exist."

"Talia spent time looking for him after she first transformed," Deucalion recalled, "but she never found anything."

"The white wolf is a story, Scott," Derek explained. "My mom told it to me and my sisters all the time. It's meant to champion the best attributes of a werewolf, but he's not real."

"According to legend," Ethan began, "he was the last true alpha—well, before you. He lived like a hundred years ago and his pack controlled all others in Western Europe. He could change into this huge white wolf at will, not the struggle you have to go through or the slow slide of transformation Talia did."

"Then," Aiden continued, "one day, he vanished. No one knows what happened to him. Some say he outlived his entire pack and grew tired of watching friends die. A few say hunters killed his pack. Others say he just got tired of the world."

"Regardless, he'd be dead by now."

Ethan shrugged and the two continued eating their lunch, but Scott was good at following patterns and looking for clues and certain rumors had popped up that perked his interest. There was another wolf out there like him. Another who could become a complete wolf...and a true alpha.

"Do true alphas live longer?" he asked Deucalion one afternoon. The man's fingers stilled over his book and he turned his head slightly in the direction of Scott.

"It's not well known," the older wolf responded. "But many agree that yes, they do. Your aging is slowed down to a fraction of a human's, and once you hit your prime, even as you grow older, your body won't show any signs."

"So he could technically still be alive?"

"If he even existed in the first place."

Scott didn't end his search, pouring over every hint and scrap of evidence he could find, becoming obsessed with the white wolf. He laughed a little when he realized that Stiles, after everything, had rubbed off on him. Scott stopped going to the veterinary office, stopped going out, occasionally stopped eating. As soon as he had some idea as to where this true alpha could be found, he and his pack would move out again. They'd stayed still for far too long.

His search continued for months, eating up all his free time. A positive effect, with all of his energy directed to study, his darkness became exhausted and Scott practically ignored Deucalion for the most part. He only spoke with him to ask questions or request updates on the pack. Far too late did he sense the tension from the older wolf.

"Why are you doing this, Sc—Alpha?"

Deucalion would slip sometimes, in calling Scott by his name now. Sometimes it amused Scott and other times it hurt as the darkness would lash out at hearing his name. Their relationship was unpredictable and turbulent, like the wind. The undercurrent of power that charged their emotions troubled Scott.

"What's the point?" Deucalion pressed, trying to get him to open up and bringing Scott back to the present.

It was night. Scott had spent the past two days gone, hunting for clues. He only returned home on the brink of collapse because he'd forgotten to eat and sleep. It was wearing on Deucalion and the rest of his pack. He lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling, still puzzling through data. Deucalion snarled at him and  _that_  finally grabbed the young man's attention.

"It's not your problem, now drop it," Scott growled back. Deucalion flinched, but stayed strong.

" _Why_  is this so important to you?"

Scott stayed stubbornly quiet, not wanting to think on the answers too much himself. His reasons were private and maybe desperate. He didn't want to appear vulnerable in front of his pack, Deucalion especially, but the older man kept prodding, reaching out to touch Scott.

"Try to trust me." Words that pulled at Scott's chest, made him feel...cared for. Which couldn't be true, the darkness whispered. Deucalion didn't  _care_  about him. His touch snapped Scott's careful control and his emotions burst out like vicious caged animals.

" _Because he's like me!_ " Scott yelled, irrational anger building up within him. "He and I are the same. He could give me answers! I wouldn't be alone." He stumbled to his feet and shoved Deucalion, sending him staggering against the wall, eyes burning red as he tried to regain control. He hated himself. He sounded like such a child right now. The darkness pricked at his mind, slowly dragging across like barbed wire, berating him, feeding in to the self-loathing.

"Y-You're not alone." Deucalion's own eyes were wide, his glasses having been knocked off. "You have a pack, you're not alone."

Scott laughed bitterly and pulled away.

"I've always been singled out," he sighed, "ever since I became a wolf, pack or not. Stop fighting me on this."

"You're my alpha, I'm concerned." Deucalion tried to reach out and touch him again. The gesture was a lie, a false comfort. Even when Scott struggled to show a kindness Deucalion still barely tolerated him during a heat... _right?_  The darkness wrapped more securely around his mind and squeezed like a vice, reminding him of his failures. Even in the most recent heat Deucalion had told Scott to ' _get it done_ ', he just used Scott as the boy used him. Scott wanted to scream and whirled around instead.

"I'm your  _abuser_." His voice was steel. "I know what I am, don't pretend otherwise."

"He's not real, Alpha." Deucalion's eyes had dimmed and he no longer looked at Scott, but his face remained set.

"He  _is_  real." Scott was determined. "I know it, he's like me. I have to find him. You wouldn't understand."

"I wouldn't understand?" And for once Deucalion looked furious, eyes becoming red and face thunderous. He clenched his fists to cover the tremble in his hands, voice cracking as he spoke. "I wouldn't understand hearing about a true alpha, someone different from his peers? Different like a demon wolf is? Someone who could understand being alone, separate from the rest, even with a pack?  _I wouldn't understand!?_ " He released a ragged breath and suddenly sagged against the wall. Deucalion didn't often reveal his own thoughts and feelings, especially about any time before coming to Beacon Hills, and talking about his personal reasons for traveling to find Scott in the first place blindsided the boy for a moment. The irony was not lost on Scott about how often they had mirroring arguments. But...something about his words pushed through the darkness and self-loathing.

Scott rushed forward and crashed against Deucalion,mouth finding his neck and biting hard, hand sliding down and brushing over his groin. The older man jerked in surprise, Scott not having touched him in months, and moaned as the boy started licking at his chest.

They tore off their clothes and Scott fucked the other alpha deep into the mattress, claws scraping against his side and teeth nipping at his neck. Deucalion whimpered at the attention, back arching against Scott's chest. The boy pressed their bodies together and slid his hands down the other's chest, generally never touching him this much. His hands came to rest at the older wolf's hips and he thrust in, bringing his mouth close to Deucalion's ear and whispering, " _Mine_."

The man underneath him screamed as he orgasmed, body shaking and muscles clenching, sending Scott over the edge as well.

He collapsed on top of Deucalion's back, heaving himself up a few seconds later to move over to his own bed. A hand caught his arm.

"Y-You're not alone," Deucalion panted, face still buried in the sheets. Scott finally remembered him saying those words long ago, when Scott first started fighting against his temper. "Please believe me, you're not alone." For one desperate second, Scott wanted to trust him, needed to believe that Deucalion— _someone_ —really cared for him. But like a rope around his neck, the darkness pulled taunt and cut off his emotions, telling him the truth, as always.

Of course he was alone.

* * *

 

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* * *


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

A week later Scott found the vital clue he was looking for. A week after that his pack left their city and was back on the road, this time with a car. Kali, Deucalion, and Derek took everything in stride, having expected this to happen eventually.

"We stayed there long enough, anyways." Kali shrugged. "It was getting boring."

The twins, on the other hand, did not take the news well. Of the entire pack they had taken the integration seriously and really involved themselves with the city and people. From what Scott understood, they'd made friends—or maybe even something more, according to Kali—they had their favorite spots to hang out, and had even started planning a life there. Which was stupid.

"It's was always a temporary measure," Scott had told them crossly. "I said so from the beginning. Don't blame me for getting too deeply invested in the people here. You shouldn't have."

"Well I'm sorry we're not like you and can just turn our feelings off," Aiden hissed.

"Couldn't we at least keep in contact with our friends here?" Ethan bargained, trying not to get as worked up as his brother.

"Of course not," Scott growled. "As soon as we go on the move again hunters will start to take notice, we're not going to leave any evidence for them. We leave everything behind in this city.  _Everything_. Even our feelings."

So both of the twins were pissed at Scott and had become slightly unruly. Scott didn't let it bother him, far too invested in finding the white wolf to really care at the moment.

"I'm not going to say I believe he exists," Kali said in the car as they drove away from their old home, "but if he did, where does your research say he'd be?"

"Egypt," Scott answered, like it was the most obvious answer in the world. He pulled out several articles he'd printed. "There are a number of rumors about a white wolf appearing all over eastern and western Europe, although none in the Americas, so its safe to say he's never been there, but the most recent ones—like, in the past 20 years, are all focused in northern Africa." Kali didn't look impressed with all the paperwork shoved in her face. Scott withdrew a marker, biting the cap between his teeth, and circled several important paragraphs for her. "I've narrowed it down to Egypt. More than a dozen recorded sightings of a white wolf in the past ten years, all around dawn. It's become something of a symbol to people there. Usually a sign of hope...or a sign of death, people can't agree, but—"

"God, you're sounding like Stiles." Derek chuckled from the driver's seat.

"You would know," Scott quipped back and watched his pack mate's ears turn red.

"It could be him," Kali admitted, "or someone  _thought_  they saw a white wolf once and then people just latched onto the idea. It could be an urban legend."

"Possibly, but it's the best link I have, so we need to check it out."

They made their way slowly south. Scott, though anxious, wasn't in any hurry to get there, not wanting to draw attention from any local hunters. It got harder and harder as the twins grew more agitated and started testing Scott's patience. It got to the point where even Deucalion was annoyed and began snapping at them. Scott's excitement at following the white wolf's trail had led to him being more lenient than usual, but they were pushing him too far and Scott warned Deucalion that he would snap soon if they didn't control themselves.

His breaking point came the day after they got to Greece, planning to take a boat from there to Egypt. The night before had been aggravating enough: he and Deucalion had engaged in another argument. It was becoming more of a frequent occurrence as Scott's obsession increased. Deucalion grew more worried and Scott grew more frustrated at the attention, added to the fact the twins were testing him and the argument had turned physical. It ended with Scott reminding Deucalion who was the submissive in the harshest way possible. The next morning the older wolf's neck was covered in vicious bite marks that were still healing, as a reminder to the rest of the pack who was alpha.

Aiden quickly walked over to Deucalion's side, but Scott growled at him. " _Don't_. It's part of his punishment." The older boy glared daggers at him but remained silent, which should have sent warning bells off in Scott but he wasn't paying attention, too focused on planning out the travel arrangements with Kali and Derek.

They sold the car and headed to the shipyard on foot, following the sloping hills to the coast. It was as they were just a few miles away that Aiden spoke up, away from human eyes.

"So that's just it?!" he yelled, fangs showing. "We disagree with you and that's what you'll do to us?"

Scott heaved a sigh,  _not_  in the mood for this. "Yep. That's what I do," he deadpanned. "I'm the alpha, what I say goes. And let's not even pretend this is about Deucalion. This about us leaving your precious city and you not liking it and now you're throwing a goddamn hissy fit."

"Fuck you, it's not just about that!" Aiden made an aggressive move towards him. Scott didn't react but Deucalion did, reaching out and grabbing Aiden's arm.

"Drop it,  _please_."

"No!" Aiden wrenched his arm away. "He's a kid and somehow he's the one in charge? He's a psychopath who doesn't know how to run a pack, chasing after a ghost that doesn't even exist!"

" _Aiden_ ," Ethan warned, though Scott noticed he didn't exactly disagree.

"Irrelevant, Aiden." Scott rolled his eyes. "Take out your frustrations here and now before we get a ship. Yell as loud as you want, I don't care."

" _And if I don't want to get on the ship?_ " His beta's eyes turned dark red in challenge.

"You have to, I'm your alpha," Scott bit out and turned his back, done with everything and needing to get some space. Aiden could work out his rage on this field for all he cared, they still had time.

Far too late did Scott register that the threat was real, that Aiden was serious. It had never even occurred to Scott that a pack member would attack him and so he honestly wasn't prepared to feel claws rip into his arm and back as Aiden tried to snap at his neck to assert dominance. Fear and pure instinct kept that from happening as Scott's knees buckled and he hit the ground, rolling with his momentum and coming up a few feet away, shock then paralyzing his body.

The entire pack had frozen, no one quite believing what had happened and Scott felt something crack in his mind, like a dam breaking. His pack had attacked him. One of his own. A wolf sworn to protect him had struck while his back was turned...he—they...

He felt something rip in his chest—his heart?—and his mind splintered. Scott grabbed his forehead, screaming in pain as his transformation completely engulfed him. His mind was torn asunder at the betrayal and from there the darkness burst forth, swallowing all conscious thought and pushing the urge to kill to the forefront on Scott's mind. He thought he might have been crying, but that was impossible as claws ripped through his skin and his whole body convulsed as he shifted.

People were shouting around him, but Scott couldn't understand the words. His entire world narrowed to the wolf that attacked him. Aiden stood looking at Scott with something akin to horror, Ethan ran up and grabbed his arm, trying to pull him away, desperately close to crying. Scott struck out, becoming a blur of fur and sharp teeth. He tore at Ethan's leg, ripping at muscles and tossing the young man to the ground several feet away before turning to Aiden.

The other wolf ran to his twin but Scott didn't let him. His claws sunk into the older boy's side as his jaws came up and pierced flesh, blood spattering out. Aiden cried out as he fell to the ground and tried to fight back but Scott had the advantage and slashed at his chest and arms. Fear was rolling off his pack mate and Scott snarled in victory, striking out at the boy's neck. Another body collided with his and Scott rolled with the blow, jumping up a second later. Ethan was over his brother, trying to combine and Scott leapt up, jaws cracking bone and tearing at his shoulder. The twin fell like a rock and Aiden screamed something. Scott roared, throwing himself at the other boy, darkness churning in his mind demanding death.

Just as Scott had Aiden's neck in his mouth, teeth tore through skin, and the flavor of spice and electricity hit his tongue. Scott stopped short, reality returning to him to find Deucalion had placed his arm across Aiden's neck. Scott's teeth had sunken deep into his flesh, blood pouring freely and spilling across the ground. He would have to tear through the older wolf's arm to get to the traitor. Scott snarled, clamping down harder in warning.

"Don't do this," Deucalion begged. He had to be in terrible pain, but his face was blank. "Please, don't kill them." Scott felt his hackles rise, trying to convey with his eyes how ridiculous that idea was.  _Aiden attacked him!_  He was betrayed. Deucalion lied, he  _was_  alone.

"They're young and frustrated, he wasn't trying to kill y—" Scott bit down harder, his growl muffling a scream. Deucalion finally winced, voice cut off in pain. Aiden whimpered behind him, too scared to move. They were both terrified, Scott could smell and taste it. "They learned their lesson. You've proved your point. Please..." But Scott didn't want to hear anymore. Only death would satisfy him now.

The young alpha switched his gripped and pulled Deucalion's arm aside, spitting it out quickly before lunging back at Aiden, but Deucalion was quicker and threw himself again in Scott's path, this time blocking Aiden's neck with his own. Scott screamed at him, blood dripping from his fangs. Like he wouldn't tear through the older man to get what he wanted!

"Scott, don't do this," Deucalion begged again, Scott flinching at the use of his name, growling at the challenge. "Don't kill the one good thing I ever did during my darkness. It's the only thing I can say I did right, the only thing I'm not ashamed of from that period of my life.  _Please_ , don't kill them." Scott blinked, anger not abated, but considering. A hand touched his back and the young alpha whirled, surprised to find Derek kneeling next to him.

"It's your choice," the older boy whispered, keeping his hand on Scott. In a way, he understood what Deucalion was saying. If Scott thought about it, Derek was for him what the twins were for Deucalion. Derek held the last bits of Scott's humanity in him, whether he knew it or not. If Derek ever died...

The urge to kill intensified, clawing at Scott's mind. He pushed back, just wanting to think, but it persisted. He needed space. He wanted to be alone. He didn't need people, he didn't need a pack. Not if all they were going to do was betray him for the smallest of things. Scott stepped back, looking at Deucalion again, his body covering Aiden's as the young man cowered behind him, trying to stem the blood flowing from his chest and side. Although bright red with sight, Scott couldn't read Deucalion's eyes in that moment.

Scott ran. He ran as fast as he could, not particularly caring which direction, he just needed to get away. It was perhaps a good thing wolves couldn't cry.

He stopped somewhere in the middle of a meadow, rolling grassy hills surrounded him and pale, rocky ledges dotted the landscape. The sounds and smells of humans were gone. There was nothing out here and Scott dropped to the ground, the turmoil that had been building up in him for the past several years finally spilled out.

He lay curled up tightly on himself, staring at the cloudy sky for hours, watching the world slowly turn. Eventually night fell, the stars greeted him and then several hours later, the sun rose again. Scott still didn't move.

He didn't need a pack. It would be easier to search for the white wolf on his own. Hunters would never be able to track him. The others would get along fine without him, perhaps better. Scott didn't care, he  _didn't_.

A dull ache pulsated through the length of his back, reminding him of his injuries, and he twisted his head to look at the damage. The long claw marks were still there and blood matted his fur. The wounds had healed slowly. He just...he hadn't considered his own pack would attack him, at least not recently. How naive he'd been: that sense of family he thought he'd felt growing over the years had been false. They were a pack of alphas, of course one of his wolves would turn on him.

Scott pushed himself to his feet and made his way to the coast, the wind picked up and the temperature dropped with the windshield making the air crisp and biting. Large, intimidating steel ships came into view as Scott found the dock and hundreds of crates lined the concrete ground creating a patchwork of colors from a distance.

It would be easier to stow away in this form, Scott decided, he could just curl up in some small corner and wait for them to land in Egypt. It was simpler than transforming back human completely naked and dealing with that headache of skirting around trying to not be seen. Scott padded down to the harbor, ducking under barbed wire and dodging security guards. He sat where he had a clear vantage point of all the ships and calculated his best chance of getting on one. A small sound caught his ear and the alpha ducked low, growling.

"Scott?" It was Derek. Of course it was. Scott huffed and turned back around to the shipyard. The young man quickly made his way up to the alpha, reaching out to pet him. Scott snarled and the hand withdrew. "We—I was getting worried." He caught sight of Scott's back and winced, eyes dropping to stare at the ground. "That looks bad. C'mon we have to get you back, I can stitch that up." Scott ignored him and kept his eyes forward, still evaluating his chances for a ship. He struggled to keep his heart steady, to show no emotion. Derek finally realized that he wasn't paying attention and he followed his alpha's gaze. Scott heard as his breathing stuttered. "A-are you thinking about leaving? Without us?" Scott made himself not look up. "B-but we're pack." And now Scott growled at the words, baring his fangs at Derek.

_Pack wouldn't attack the alpha._

"Scott, they're sorry." Derek spoke of the twins. "You proved your status as the alpha, you punished them. They learned their lesson, it will  _never_  happen again." Scott's ears twitched at the plea in Derek's voice. "Please. Let's just go back." This was too painful. Unable to listen to another word, Scott sprinted towards a random ship, hopeful that Derek would not follow. "You can't leave us!" Derek's voice cracked. Right, he had abandonment issues. Scott's body stopped against his will. "You promised me we were family!"

He  _did_  make that promise. It seemed like a lifetime ago. Scott let out a long sigh, his whole body slumping. He didn't know what he was doing anymore. All he wanted was answers, about himself and this darkness that tainted and trapped him. He just wanted—needed to find this white wolf but now everything had fallen apart.

" _Scott?_ " Derek had never asked anything of him since joining the pack. His only wish seemed to be to remain at Scott's side. His eyes burned and Scott shook his head, trying to clear away the thoughts in his mind. Hateful urges pushed to leave his pack behind, but his own grief and exhaustion overpowered it. To be fair, no one ever said being an alpha was easy. Scott looked one more time at the ships, tilted his head and met Derek's eyes, and realized he never could abandon his own—at least not with Derek looking at him like that. He turned around and started heading back to the city.

"Thank you," Derek said and Scott didn't like how grateful he sounded, he never liked when people thanked him, it almost never was deserved. He nipped at the Derek's fingers, surprised when the young man ran his hand over Scott's head, petting at the soft fur.

Derek lead him back to a warehouse off in an abandoned part of the city. They arrived just as night was falling, enough time for Scott's anger and resentment to come back full force. He took one look at the twins, lying in makeshift cots covered in bandages—and noticed everyone flinch in terror as he entered—before swiftly turning away for a separate room. His body ached and a hunger to kill pricked at his mind, claws and teeth itching to tear. Scott couldn't be around his pack at the moment.

Deucalion pursued him, quietly walking behind the young alpha and kneeling at his feet, submission rolling off his body. Scott tried not to see how the older man's neck was bared, how his head was tilted down, the way his eyes refused to meet Scott's, or the slight tremor in his hands and shoulders. Seeing Deucalion displayed like that and the wrongness of it was like slap in Scott's face. He wanted to fight, to scream and cry until his chest didn't feel like it was going to burst anymore, but more than anything, Scott just wanted to be alone. Deucalion finally shifted under Scott's silence.

"I—" Scott growled abruptly. He didn't want words from him right now. He turned away, belatedly realizing his bite mark still graced Deucalion's arm but was almost completely healed. Scott's mind raced and he struggled to still his thoughts, picking out a memory from his jumbled mind got harder and harder every year. Like looking at a puzzle that kept having pieces removed each time you saw at it.

Scott finally glanced down at his arm, where his tattoo was in his human form.  _An open wound_. Seemed appropriate given his life choices. He remembered the pain of getting it done again, Derek and Stiles holding him down, fire torching his flesh and the memory of Allison burned into his mind. He couldn't remember the details of her face anymore. Just her smile and scent, like flowers in the rain and metal from the knives she always carried.

He remembered the feeling of her hand holding his, squeezing tight and calming his anxiety and stress. His heartbeat slowed down and she smiled.

Scott looked down at his human hands, they were shaking still, but at least he wasn't crying. He just felt hollow, his chest empty and aching. "Go away," he spat to Deucalion, back still turned to him.

"Sc—Alpha, whatever you're feeling, you can take it out on me. You have that right," Deucalion murmured. The words seemed off and Scott studied the older man, again struck by the oddness of his submission. This wasn't real. Deucalion didn't submit to him willingly, didn't care about Scott's fucked up self. The darkness twisted itself around his mind, encouraging these thoughts.

"You don't need to pretend," Scott bit out. "I see perfectly where we stand now, you just needed to teach me a final lesson. I needed to see this, I—"

"I'm  _yours_ ," Deucalion cut him off. He'd only said those words under duress before and given the situation, Scott knew the words were still a lie. This  _wasn't_  Deucalion, he never talked like this. He did not submit so easily after years of resisting. "Punish me as you see fit, Alpha. I'm yours." It felt like a violent wind blew through his chest, the pain making him gasp. Scott felt cold and hot at the same time.

He turned and snarled, "No you're not! You're not mine! You  _made_  your choice!" His rage caught up to him again. "You chose to side with the attacker! You made it clear. I thought you'd understand, you were attacked once by pack, but you chose him over me! You're not mine, you  _never_  were, so don't pretend like you care." He wasn't going to cry. Scott ran a hand over his face and steeled himself.

"I'm sorry," Deucalion choked out, placing his hands on the ground and bowing his head even lower. It was all wrong to Scott, everything seemed so wrong. Deucalion didn't apologize to him, didn't truly accept him as a dominate, he do  _not_  bow to Scott. Why now? It didn't make any sense. "You're not alone, I swear."

"Stop lying!" Scott yelled and finally struck out, punching the older man in the face. "I'm so fucking sick of it! You're not mine,  _stop_  saying that! It's never been true before now, you taught me that. What test are you doing now? How have I failed this time? Tell me!" He was pacing, his head was killing him and Scott tried not to tear out his hair. Rage blotted out his vision, his temper boiling over. " _I'm done with you!_ " Deucalion stayed silent, but his fear was clear, his body taunt with it. Scott figured it was a huge shame to be disowned by your alpha or some bullshit. It just proved he was doing this for himself, not Scott.

He broke. Scott finally released his pain and whirled away and strode towards the wall, tears burning at the edge of his eyes. He should have left, he should have ignored Derek and left. He didn't want to do this anymore.

"Sc—" Deucalion's red eyes widened and he flinched. He looked devastated, like something new had been shown to him and his entire world had changed because of it. Scott couldn't stand the way Deucalion's face was twisted in bitter regret; he had no right to look that way.

"Go," Scott said, voice cracking, "just go. Be with  _your_  pack." Deucalion finally got up, but only to walk closer to Scott, dropping back to his knees when he was an arms reach away. His fingers trembled when he reached out, as if he were afraid to break Scott, and he looked so close to breaking as well, but  _he had no right!_

"That darkness inside you," Deucalion whispered, "whatever you're holding back, just let it go and take it out on me. I promise, it'll help." But Scott was done with everything, he just wanted to be left alone and he kept crying. He should be lashing out, but his own misery felt like bricks. A person could only take so much. He had failed so completely it was a little breathtaking; he'd failed as a person, a son, a friend, even as an alpha. There was nothing left in him that could keep going, nothing left to fight for.

Something brushed across his forehead and drew Scott back, making him look up. Deucalion had reached over and kissed him softly, a hand cupping the back of his head, the gesture so intimate it hurt Scott's entire body. He cracked and came undone, splinters of pain burst forth and Scott threw Deucalion back, screaming in rage. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he realized Deucalion must have done that on purpose, but the shadows in him didn't care and the urge to destroy was overwhelming. All his frustration and fury over the past few days came bubbling forth. Scott did as Deucalion suggested and took all of it out on him.

It wasn't even sexual, though Scott was completely naked. He simply lashed out, breaking bone and skin and Deucalion offered no resistance, not even trying to block. It felt endless, but maybe that was just the anger talking. He couldn't stop, but a part of him grew more upset that Deucalion wasn't fighting back.

Scott promised himself he wouldn't break the other man, so far it was one of the few promises he had managed to keep. The boy forcefully stopped his body from moving, the wrath sated and dissipating in his mind. He came back to himself, aware that Deucalion was underneath him, breath sounding ragged and pained, but alive. Scott was also aware of someone crying from outside the room, another voice. It was Aiden and Scott realized the rest of the pack could hear what was happening, the walls weren't that thick.

"He's just upset." Deucalion coughed, his face a bloody mess. Bones moved under his skin as he healed, teeth regrew. Scott figured Aiden thought Deucalion was suffering for his transgression, and he wasn't too far off. "You don't have to stop," Deucalion continued. He tried to sit up but neither of his arms could support him at the moment. "Whatever you need to do, I'm here."

The way he said it troubled Scott. The fact that he was saying things like this at all confused him. He looked down at his own hands that were bruised from how hard he hit the other. Frustration welled up in his chest. He picked up Deucalion and threw him against the wall, grabbing his neck and tilting his head to the side. The older wolf whined, dropping his shoulders to show more of his neck. The faint scar of Scott's first bite still showed, reminding him of his brutal savagery from those first few months. It was an ugly souvenir and the young alpha scrapped a claw over it experimentally.

"No, don't—" Deucalion began and cut himself off quickly. His eyes dulled to a pale blue and Scott knew he was trying to cover up all his emotions. Whatever Scott had almost done was probably the beginning of disowning a pack member. He snarled at the older wolf who only tilted his head more, submitting as much as he could. Scott realized he wasn't going to get a fight from the other today. He ran a nail over the bite again.

" _Wait_." It came out a command but Deucalion's eyes flashed in desperation.

"Why is this so important?" Scott demanded. Deucalion should love not being his anymore. Should love not having to submit and be humiliated by his alpha, should hate Scott as much as the twins do. This didn't make any sense: why was Deucalion fighting him so much on this?

"Because I  _need_  to be yours," the man admitted, voice tight. "I need to stay with you. You think you're alone but you're not." As he said it, Deucalion seemed to be realizing that the words were true and his voice grew steadier. Scott's chest twisted in pain again and he gritted his teeth. It wasn't true, it couldn't be. Deucalion didn't care about him, he  _hated_  Scott— _right?_

Scott snarled and turned the other around, his body reacting without any conscious thought. Deucalion's legs were still healing and shook as they tried to support his own weight. Scott stuck a knee forward to support him and bit at the offered neck at last making Deucalion sob in relief. He worked on instinct, pulling at his jeans and shoving a finger inside Deucalion, trying to open him up. The man made a pained noise but didn't struggle against Scott, and the boy twisted his finger and cried out in anger. Too dry, he didn't have anything here to prepare the other and he couldn't—he didn't want to hurt— _god he just_ — _too much_ —everything  _hurt_  too much—

Scott collapsed against Deucalion's back and started weeping openly.

Deucalion turned around, leaning heavily against the wall, and Scott found himself in the other's arms. Like a child, he latched on and poured everything out, face buried in the older man's neck. He couldn't remember the last time he had been hugged and it just made everything more painful. He was tired of being in pain, he was tired of hurting people around him, he was tired of...fighting for the love and approval he was never going to get.

"—my fault." Scott realized Deucalion had been speaking to him, or maybe had just been talking to try and relieve the stress. Scott clutched onto him harder and tried to take deep breaths.

"Wh-what's wrong with me?" he asked. If someone could just tell him, perhaps he wouldn't feel so lost. Scott just wanted someone to understand him.

"I—I have no answer," Deucalion replied honestly, his voice tinged with regret. Scott cringed, as if a bucket of ice water had been dumped on him and he wrenched himself away, stumbling back. "What—"

Scott bit his lip and looked away, he wished people would stop lying to him. He angrily wiped at his face and met Deucalion's eyes. The answer wasn't here and it wasn't with him.

"You can't help me."

Deucalion recoiled. He struggled to stay upright, body still healing. Scott's eyes dropped to the ground, at the broken glass by his feet where his reflection stared back at him. He watched as his eyes became bleak and dull until nothing but a shell of a person stared back at him. "The only one who can—who  _will_  understand me, is the white wolf."

"No, that's not true." Deucalion voice caught in the back of his throat and he tried to reach out. "Let me try, I can make up for my mistakes." It didn't make any sense to Scott still, where this change came from. The more Deucalion spoke the heavier his shoulders got. He released a long breath suddenly, the tail end coming out in a self-deprecating laugh—or maybe a sob. "I'm so sorry, Scott."

Scott frowned, the realization that swept through Deucalion's face seemed out of place. He shook his head, too empty inside to try and figure out what the man was feeling. "I am alone, Deucalion," he reiterated, "and no one here can help me. You don't need to bother anymore."

" _Yes, I do_." Deucalion's voice burned with conviction and a flicker of an emotion stirred within Scott. "Now more than ever because—" He cut himself off, afraid of what he was about to say. "You're important, I see that now. You're my alpha, you'll never walk alone."

"I—" Scott  _wanted_  to believe. The darkness slid back out, filling the crevices of him mind, smothering the spark of hope that had tried to start. He turned around and made for the door.

"No, wait." Deucalion tried to follow but couldn't even manage to lift himself from the wall, instead collapsing further. "Please don't..."

"I'm not leaving," Scott explained shortly and burst out of the side room, back to the main area with the pack. They all jumped at his presence and the young alpha stalked over to Kali, who was guarding the group's supplies and where his backpack and extra clothes were.

"Scott, your back is still—" Scott had forgotten about the slashes on his arm and back, but nothing really mattered at the moment.

"They'll heal." He cut off Derek as he got dressed. He moved and laid down behind Kali, who was honestly the only one he felt he could trust right now as she just didn't care about anything. "Don't let the others come near me," he ordered and she gave a curt nod, understanding instantly. Scott didn't give a smile, but he nodded nonetheless and fell to the floor in exhaustion.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lot's of drama in this chapter. Angst. So much angst.
> 
> Hey everybody! Sorry for the long wait, summer is a busy time at my work so I haven't had as much time as I'd like to devote to this story but don't worry, it's still progressing. My beta and I are hard at work. Next chapter will be up probably in a week or two to make up for it! Anyways, thanks everyone who is still following this story and for the hits and comments. Reviews really do help a writer and make them feel appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Manhe, Bedalk05, and dea_umbrium for their reviews last chapter, you guys are so awesome! As always, a big thanks to my beta for pushing me to do my best. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter after the dramatic last one. Let me know what you think.

* * *

The next day wasn't any easier. The pack's emotions were everywhere and Scott, as the alpha, could unfortunately feel every one of them and it strained his already stressed mind. Of all his wolves Derek's behavior was the most erratic, his sole focus on Scott. He paced constantly, tension clear in his tight steps, his scent radiated worry and a desire to comfort. Derek would occasionally try to walk up to Scott only for Kali to snarl at him, nails clicking out dangerously and daring him to come closer. Scott curled tighter in on himself from where he lay, confusion sweeping through him as a part of him wished for console, but another part dreaded being touched.

Similarly, Deucalion's concern for Scott was evident, but he was still recovering from his own injuries, and instead fixed the younger alpha with a calculating gaze that frightened Scott more than he cared to admit. Deucalion's words last night had hit him hard, made him want to hope again, but after years of listening to the older man reject and hate him, Scott just couldn't accept that he suddenly changed. Overpowering his worry though, Scott felt Deucalion's anger and hurt directed at Aiden for the betrayal. The older boy hadn't spoken a word to anyone since the fight, but his fear was obvious, especially around Scott, as was Ethan's.

Kali—oddly—was the only anchor Scott had at the moment, a pillar of calm and stability.

Eventually he couldn't take the strained silence any longer and sat up, pocketing the wolfsbane bullet he always carried with him. The pack tensed at his movement.

"How much longer?" Scott asked Kali. The woman tilted her head as she considered the wolves in front of them, eyes sharp.

"He'll be fine in a few hours." She spoke of Deucalion. "They'll take another two days at most."

"Ok." Scott stood up and nodded to her, muscles taut with tension and heartbeat loud in his ears. Kali's gaze shifted to him, noticed his reaction, and nodded back in understanding. Scott wanted to thank her—a part of him wanted to stay, but his instincts demanded he run, flee the uncomfortable situation and let the storm pass. Such a coward. Scott clenched his fists and turned to the door, planning to run out.

"Scott—what, wait!" Derek called out after him and started in pursuit. Scott sprinted faster, covering his scent. He just needed to be alone for awhile, away from the weight of his pack. Derek didn't let up and Scott ran as quickly as his human legs would allow.

Eventually he lost the older boy in the city amongst the winding buildings and clutter of people. Scott wandered aimlessly, climbing high up, traveling by rooftop alone. It was more peaceful, away from others, the smells and sounds distant.

His mind was still in turmoil, body confused as to what it wanted and Scott wondered how it all fell apart so quickly, or if the change had been gradual and he just hadn't noticed. The white wolf was important to him, more important than all the slaughter he had committed over the years. Should he have embarked on this quest alone to start with? Uprooting his pack, while all part of the plan, did seem against instinct. A pack was supposed to settle and make a den, only roaming if in times of danger. Perhaps he should still leave, those who wanted to follow could—no. Something pulled inside of Scott. It was against their nature. An alpha was a leader, but an alpha needed a pack.

The darkness crawled inside and told him to continue what he'd started back at the warehouse. Show his dominance and assert that his way was the  _only_  way. If the twins argued, he could always maul them again. Scott clutched at his head, pain blooming within his skull. There had to be another way. A part of him was tired of the brutality. The darkness scratched at it, but Scott persisted. He just needed time to think.

The boy—man at this point—he was twenty-one for God's sake—finally stopped, perched upon one of the highest buildings and sat down. Instead of looking at the sky, he gazed down at the city, watching life stream by in the form of cars and people. They looked like ants, so tiny while he was far away, removed from it all. They were each an individual with a life as rich and complex as his own.

Around nightfall, a desperate and worried howl sounded in the distance. It was Deucalion. Scott was a bit surprised, thinking Derek would have been the one to keep searching. He debated on whether to howl back. After another cry, this time much closer to panic, he realized the older wolf just wanted to make sure Scott hadn't actually left them behind in the city. The young man answered back with his own bay, one of acknowledgement and reassurance, though with an icy undertone to not bother him again.

From that point until morning Scott did nothing but watch the city through the senses of a wolf. It was strange. He'd never thought to do it before, seeing the world in a different light, it gave him an odd sense of peace.

He spent the next two days wandering aimlessly throughout the city, staying to the shadows and making his way further out to the coast and walking along the rocky ledges as the scent of sea spray clouded all his senses. Unable to hear or smell anything else around him made Scott almost feel human again but as the sun rose on the second day he knew it was time to return to reality and deal with the consequences of his actions.

Scott took his time returning to the warehouse. Most of his anger was still there, but he had it under control, the dark urges suppressed. A large part of him was simply tired. Ever since he'd started his search for the white wolf, he'd been growing tired, like he was losing a part of himself, maybe the last of himself, but Scott didn't know, didn't care to know.

"Alpha!" Scott looked up to see Kali waiting for him outside, although far enough away that other wolves wouldn't be able to overhear.

"You don't seem surprised," he said and she chuckled, flipping her hair over her shoulder.

"I'm not insecure like those boys." Kali rolled her eyes. "Slapped Derek when he got back from chasing you."

"Wh-what?" Scott's eyebrows flew up.

"He was being  _stupid_. I asked him if he wanted you to have another fit and transform. I know you're the alpha and all, but you shouldn't have to baby the pack and be there every second to hold our hands."

"Thank you," Scott said and meant every word.

The woman gave a shrug. "No one ever said being an alpha was easy. I thought the Hale boy would have understood that best of all."

"How is it in there?" He tilted his head to the rundown building behind her.

"Tense," Kali answered. "The twins are well enough to travel, although Aiden's pretty messed up right now, but at least docile. I still don't know what was going on in his head when he attacked you, I'm not even sure he does. They've kept close together while you were gone, scared of the rest of us. Derek won't even acknowledge them and Deucalion...well, you didn't see him when we first made camp here. Derek went out to search for you after I got the medical equipment and as I was patching them up when he just broke down."

"Deucalion?" Scott didn't quite believe it. "Are you sure it was about me? Maybe he was just worried about the twins?" It still didn't sound right, but it was the only thought he could grasp at. Kali snorted.

"You're the only one that gets under his skin like that. I've traveled with Deucalion for a long time and known him a bit longer. No one's ever managed to fuck with him the way you do." Scott's heart thudded painfully in his chest and he was forced to look away, teeth clenched. "It's all fair, Alpha." Kali shrugged. "He's fucked with your life too. You just—" Kali seemed to be trying to organize her words carefully "—he's always held this justification before, that while the rest of us attacked our pack solely for power, he did it out of self-preservation by being attacked first. In his mind he had the moral high ground and that put him above the rest of us, but then you come along and now he's the betrayer. He went against his alpha, protected someone like Marco and for what?"

Scott frowned, still looking at the ground. "I've seen betas go against their alpha before; I'm one of them. Never caused me to break down."

"You have to understand, he considers himself  _yours_  and there's a certain pride in belonging to a powerful alpha—doesn't matter how you treat him personally—and to go against all of that and choose someone else over your alpha is, well, pretty serious. On top of that he lost all that righteousness he had before, anything that he could hold over you or against you is all gone. You  _should_  have disowned him as soon as you got back, it's what he was expecting. He knew this would cost him everything he had left. Of course he broke down."

"Ah," Scott said. It made Deucalion's actions a bit clearer from the night before, but not completely. Still didn't explain his abrupt change in attitude and sudden care for Scott. A thought occurred to him then. "But I didn't, or I don't think I disowned him."

"You did the opposite, Alpha." Kali looked a cross between exasperated and amused. "You actually restaked your claim on him. I couldn't believe it, neither did he, come to think of it. When he stumbled back out after you had fallen asleep...he looked—amazed? But also disconcerted. His face was priceless, I'll tell you that much. Not sure exactly what happened between you two in there."

"You and me both." Scott sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"Well, something changed in him," Kali unknowingly confirmed for Scott.

"Kali?" He needed to hear a straight answer. "Do you think I should leave? Just...leave for Egypt and finish this on my own instead of dragging the pack around with me."

"I—" She looked torn, perhaps aware that her opinion mattered and could sway his decision. "A pack follows their alpha, Scott." He blinked at her using his name. "It's just that simple."

"I wish." Scott sighed.

"They'll follow," she insisted. "I know the Hale boy would follow you regardless. Besides," and a glint came to Kali's eyes, "I want to see what's at the end of the rabbit hole."

"What?" Scott frowned.

"This hunt you're on. White wolf, white rabbit—same thing really."

"Huh." Scott had never thought of it that way. "I guess he is my white rabbit. Does that make me Alice?"

"You are very pretty." And it had been such a long time since Scott had laughed that it felt weird, almost painful, but he didn't care. The laugh must have been loud enough to catch the rest of the pack's attention as the door to the warehouse opened and Derek came out, rushing over when he saw Scott.

"You're back." He moved a touch Scott and Kali blocked his path, growling. Derek pulled back, confused and hurt.

"I'm still under orders not to let others come close."

Scott rolled his eyes. "Thanks for the dedication, I think we're good now." She smiled to reveal two rows of sharp teeth and moved back. Scott let Derek touch his arm, his beta grasping it tight.

"I'm sorry for not giving you space."

"You were worried. It's in your nature," Scott answered, bumping shoulders gently as he passed him. Derek whined at the contact and pulled them closer together, burying his head in Scott's neck. The young man tensed, but he knew the other wolf was just scenting him. He wrapped his arms around Derek's shoulder, fingers brushing against the nape of his neck and curling into his hair. "Are we ready to leave?" he asked, pulling away and walking through towards the doors.

Both twins startled badly at Scott's voice, jumping at the sight of him, scents spiking in terror as they pressed closer to each other. Ethan had let out a small yelp at Scott's entrance, arm whipping out and latching onto Aiden's as small tremors ran through his body. He was the only one that still had bandages on, wrapped securely around his neck and shoulder. Aiden's face was twisted in fear, going pale, and his eyes never left Scott as he watched to see what his alpha would do.

Scott figured he should deal with part of the issue now and strode up to the two, both wolves flinching as he drew closer. Out of the corner of his eye, Scott saw Deucalion stiffen and hold himself back from going over. Neither of the twins met his eyes when he stopped in front of them, although Aiden placed his body between Scott and Ethan's.

"Next time you attack me," Scott warned, "I will kill your brother and make you watch." Aiden's eyes widened and their scents spiked further in panic. Scott belatedly realized that both their heads were lowered and necks exposed, which they had never done before. "Do we understand each other?"

"Y-Yes." Aiden nodded. "I'm sorry, Alpha. I'm so sorry. Th-thank you for not killing us—my brother."

"You owe that to Deucalion, not me," Scott replied shortly and turned back around. "C'mon, we're moving out." The twins hastened to follow only to stop as Scott halted suddenly, remembering his original mistake. "Oh, and I'm sorry for uprooting the pack, Aiden. I know it's against instinct."

"I—" The older boy looked wrecked and Scott left him standing there before walking up to their supplies and grabbing his bag. He felt more than saw Deucalion come up next to him and Scott repressed a sigh. Too much had happened between them and the air turned suffocating as the other drew closer. Deucalion's glasses were on so the younger alpha couldn't read his face, but his scent was an odd mixture of nerves and longing. Scott couldn't think of anything to say.

"Deucalion," he greeted, trying for nonchalance.

"Alpha," the man replied, voice sliding over the title in a way that made Scott's stomach knot up. Deucalion didn't touch him, but his shoulders were loose, head tilted slightly to show his neck. His body language told Scott everything; declaring that he posed no threat and showed humble submission. It raked across Scott's mind and his fangs pushed out, wanting to claim.

He spun around instead. "Are you healed?" Scott asked with his back to Deucalion, forcing his heartbeat to steady.

"Yes, of course." Deucalion stepped up next to Scott, face a blank slate while he wore his glasses, eyes unreadable. The only tell to his nervousness was the slight tensing in his jaw. "You...the other day when—"

"Listen," Scott huffed, afraid of a tender moment, "you're still mine, is this a problem?"

"No." The response was muted, but there was a warmth in Deucalion's voice Scott had never heard before. He looked over to the other man, wishing he could see his eyes, and shook his head as a wave of pain washed over him. His temper tried to flare but Scott tamped it down instantly.

"I-I'm sorry about the other night," he said and reached up to brush his fingers across Deucalion's face. The older man startled but leaned into the touch a moment later.

"I did, technically, ask for it."

"Doesn't make it better." Scott dropped his hand, eyes falling to stare at the ground and he hiked up his bag on his shoulder and started to walk away.

"Sc—Alpha." Scott got the impression that Deucalion would try to continue their previous conversation and he decided to cut it off.

"—anything else can wait until we get on a ship."

It ended up being fairly easy to obtain passage on a ship, all they needed was money. Five hours later Scott and his pack were finally making their way to Egypt and the white wolf. It helped that nobody tried to attack him this time. Each tiny room only had two bunks, so Kali and Derek were forced to share, which Scott found hilarious. Neither interacted with the other much outside of necessity as Derek deeply mistrusted her for the help in killing his pack. When they did have conversations it was a very antagonistic dialogue charged with heavy sarcasm. Normally, Scott would be worried about the two of them sharing such close quarters but Kali got easily seasick, curling up in her top bunk, basically dead to the world.

Derek sighed. "At least we won't kill each other."

Scott had planned on sleeping most of the voyage as well, still exhausted from the past week's events, but his own issues cropped up. As soon as they were alone Deucalion sat on the bottom bunk and removed his glasses, glazed blue eyes staring at the floor, and Scott knew he couldn't put off talking anymore. His shoulders thudded against the wall as he fell back and slowly slid to the ground, arms going around his knees. Scott curled in on himself as Deucalion's scent kept shifting from desire to worry. He noted the older man's heartbeat was steady, but there was a slight tremble in his fingers.

"Gonna try to fix me?" Scott muttered at last. Deucalion gave a dry chuckle that held no humor.

"I wish it were that easy."

Scott's fingers dug into the denim of his jeans. The room was silent save for their quiet breathing and the occasional flicker of the dim lights. The moment stretched on until something shifted in the air and when Scott glanced over to Deucalion he noticed the man's eyes were a bright red, focused intently on him. It felt like a challenge and a growl started to rise in Scott's chest, the back of his neck tingling at the heated gaze.

"Wh-what?" He tried making his voice steady. Deucalion seemed to snap himself out of a haze and looked away quickly.

"Apologies, I just—" he paused, struggling with the words. "Everything looks different."

Scott narrowed his eyes. "You mean  _me_." Deucalion had only been looking at one thing just now. " _I_  look different." He shook his head. "It's just your imagination, I'm still the same."

"From your point of view," Deucalion admitted. "From mine...things have changed." Scott wanted to ask how, but realized he should just get to the heart of the matter. He shoved a hand through his hair, messing it up even further.

"What happened the other night?" he finally asked. "From my point of view, you're the one who changed." Deucalion released a long breath, his eyes dimmed back to milky blue as if he couldn't do this with his sight.

"I guess I did." Scott looked up sharply. "And to you, it may have seemed sudden, but...it wasn't." Deucalion's voice caught and his face twisted in pain. "I was just too proud to see your pain." Scott realized he had stopped breathing and made himself exhale.

"And now?"

"I'm forcing myself to see you differently." Deucalion stood up and Scott hastened to follow suit, uncomfortable being under the other. "And—I'm coming to terms with what I feel." Where did Deucalion find the strength to admit this? Scott couldn't even acknowledge how he felt in his own mind.

"So what do you see now?" Scott asked instead. The older man walked closer, until he was directly in front of Scott. He slowly sank to his knees. "Uh—"

"I see my alpha," Deucalion replied gently, his voice almost drowned out by the sound of Scott's heart pounding. Deucalion's scent shifted to complete desire as he started to undo Scott's jeans with an intense fixation. They hadn't had sex in a while, had they? He'd become obsessed with the white wolf and the two of them spent the nights arguing instead. This was also the first time, outside of a heat, that Deucalion has ever desired Scott on his own.

"You don't have to..." Scott said wincing as the darkness lashed against his mind, upset he was turning down a submissive. Deucalion freed his hardening erection and pressed close to Scott, inhaling his scent. He took a moment to collect himself before he looked up at him.

"Consider this an exercise in control and trust," he said and carefully licked Scott, sliding his mouth around his cock before taking it in. The sight of Deucalion on his knees eased something deep in Scott's chest, a primal feeling of possession that calmed a restlessness that had been scratching inside him. Scott released a long breath, letting the feeling settle over him. Deucalion pulled back, panting. "I trust you to control yourself. Let me... _help_  you."

"I—" Scott blinked, overwhelmed for a moment at what Deucalion was giving him. So long they had been at odds, fighting and snapping at each other, incapable of trust from past experiences. For years Scott had suffered being alone trapped within himself, and perhaps Deucalion had as well and now they were here at this moment, where everything could change. Scott forgot to breath, lungs burning, and he was powerless to do anything but stare.

"You're sure?" he eventually asked, finding his voice at last. "If I slip, I don't want to hurt you."

Deucalion growled, burying his head against Scott's thigh in frustration. The pitch of his voice and the way Deucalion's eyes were diverted informed Scott that the irritation wasn't directed at him. "I know it's hard for you to give me your trust, especially after what I did to you." Deucalion's voice cracked. "And maybe a small part of me doesn't care if I get hurt; I betrayed my alpha, after all."

" _No_." Scott's voice deepened, eyes sharpened as he put steel behind the word. There would be no more lashing out. What was it Ms. Morell had said?  _If you're going through hell, keep going._  "I can do this." He placed his hands on Deucalion's shoulders but made sure his claws didn't snap out. This time when Deucalion growled it was laced deeply with desire.

"I believe you," he murmured before he engulfed the younger alpha again, a desperate low whine in his throat that Scott felt the echo through his cock. His stomach coiled and he slammed his head back against the metal wall, fingers moving to run through the other's coarse bronze hair. Deucalion hummed and Scott's back arched. The older man's hands trailed up Scott's thighs to his hips, gripping tight and tilting his neck to slide more of Scott into his mouth.

" _Nngh_." Scott wasn't even sure how Deucalion was breathing.

 _Dominate_.  _Take him and—_

 _No_. Scott shook his head, trying to throw off the terrible thoughts.

This moment was so perfect he couldn't let anything taint it. Deucalion's tongue seemed to find every nerve that made Scott moan and his toes curl. He doubled over to lean against Deucalion's back.

Being wrapped so tightly in heat was bliss. A deep growl from Deucalion had Scott biting his lip to keep from coming. Using his human nails, he scratched up the man's back, causing Deucalion to buck and swallow more until he had completely surrounded him.

" _Oh god_." Scott wasn't sure how he managed to talk. He felt like he was standing on the edge of a cliff, about to plummet off into the abyss and he could barely hold himself up. Deucalion pressed his tongue against Scott's length and pulled back, dragging wet heat across sensitive nerves and Scott thought he was falling. He pushed away, sliding back down the wall until he was level with Deucalion, determined not to orgasm so quickly. Deucalion whined at the lost, though he was out of breath. He nudged Scott's legs apart and settled between them, lowering his head again. "Wait." Scott panted and gripped his shoulders, halting further movement. "Trust and control, right?"

"Yes?" Deucalion's voice was hoarse, a husky gravel that sent a shiver up Scott's spine. His hand had a life of its own and palmed at the hardness pressing against Deucalion's jeans. The older man jerked in surprise, body going tense, but that melted after a minute with a low groan.

"Trust..." Scott pondered what he wanted, which was difficult in the haze of lust, but an idea formed in his mind. "Ok, can you take off your clothes? I want you to ride me."

"I—" Shock would be an understatement as Deucalion's jaw went slack and his eyes widened. The look was fleeting as Scott's hand twisted smoothly and Deucalion's face reverted back to pleasure. "Of course." He leaned away from Scott as he removed his clothes, but the young man didn't miss the shudder than ran through his entire body or how his scent spiked sharply in excitement.

Scott reached over to his discarded bag and withdrew some of the lube he still had, jumping when Deucalion straddled him carefully, bare thighs resting against Scott's clothed ones. There was hesitation in Scott's fingers and a small stutter in Deucalion's heartbeat, but neither let that discourage them from pushing forward. Scott coated his fingers with the slick oil and moved to Deucalion's entrance as the man lifted himself up, cutting off a whine as Scott swiped a finger teasingly. His breath was hot against Scott's neck as he made small noises of pleasure, arms coming to rest against the wall to stabilize himself.

"You want this?" This question slipped from Scott, but for once he was glad it did. Deucalion froze and their eyes met. The fear in them eased and he gave Scott a quick nod, thrusting his hips forward. It was all the invitation the young man needed. He slid two fingers inside without another warning and Deucalion gave a pleased gasp, shoving himself down further on Scott's hand.

Scott got the hint and scissored his fingers, twisting around and feeling for that slight bump in the flesh. Deucalion was growling above him, clearly hanging on by a thread. A thread that snapped when Scott brushed over his prostate and pushed hard.

" _More_." And Scott had to admire that even as a submissive, Deucalion was still demanding and authoritative. Always an alpha. A cold hand wrapped itself around Scott's heart and he clenched his teeth, trying to shake off the feeling. Not every part of him liked the hint of command in Deucalion's voice. His caged hate still lurked in the back of his mind, rabid like a wild dog.

" _Unngh, Sc—Alpha_." Deucalion pulled him back to the present, the constant pressure on his prostate had left the man a quivering mess above Scott. He hastily withdrew his fingers, pausing at the noise Deucalion made, like a knife had gone through his heart. "Sorr—"

"I didn't say  _stop_." Deucalion was quick to cut him off.

Scott gave a weak smile and tried to disregard his remaining dread.

 _Control_ ; he needed to master this.

Scott lined himself up with Deucalion's entrance and guided the man's hips close to him. Deucalion let himself be directed, body relaxed and trusting Scott's hands.

Deucalion slid down slowly, panting and licking his lips as Scott filled him. The younger alpha bit the inside of his own mouth to keep quiet. It  _had_  been too long since they'd had actual sex, not just a frenzied claiming. He'd forgotten how tight Deucalion was and the perfect control he had over his muscles. When Scott was completely sheathed, Deucalion tensed his sphincter and pulled up, causing Scott to gasp at the sensation and buckled up against him, all previous worries forgotten. " _Shit_ , where'd you learn that?"

"I've my ways," Deucalion grunted, voice strained with lust. He carefully placed his hands on Scott's shoulders, eyes meeting and seeking approval that Scott granted as his hands slid back around Deucalion's hips.

" _Mine,_ " Scott whispered on instinct and Deucalion groaned, fangs elongating in his excitement as he threw himself down onto Scott. He kept up the fast pace, muscles working hard, coiled tight. Scott had never really noticed how cut the other man was, especially for his age. The younger alpha growled at the sight, his power making Deucalion's eyes glow. The older wolf whimpered.

Scott felt himself reaching his peak again and pulled Deucalion closer, teeth latching on to his neck and biting hard. Deucalion came with a rough cry, covering Scott's chest and shirt as he clenched around him, while the younger man came. They both gasped for breath, Deucalion's arms and thighs shaking in an attempt to keep himself from collapsing. Scott ran a hand down his spine, nails scratching lightly and with a rush of breath, Deucalion buckled and fell onto him. Scott caught him, stomach clenching tight.

"A-are you ok?" Scott really wished his voice would stop sounding so childish. He shifted his hips and Deucalion stirred. They were still both locked together.

"Just out of breath," the older man said and pulled back, lifting himself off Scott. It felt cold, like losing a part of himself but Scott stayed quiet and zipped his jeans back up. He stood up with Deucalion but the man wobbled dangerously and Scott leapt forward to catch him again, dragging the tired wolf over to the low bunk. "And now I feel old."

A laugh slipped out of Scott chest, surprising him "Hardly. When was the last time you ate or slept?" He shifted Deucalion so he was lying on the bed, Scott now hovering over him.

"I could ask you the same question," Deucalion said, tilting his head to the side, baring his neck. Deucalion's bronze hair stuck messily to his forehead, damp with sweat, and his red eyes shone with the afterglow of Scott's power. The muscular body lay stark in Scott's mind against the dim light with his bite mark clearly visible. The young alpha felt something stir in his chest; Deucalion was beautiful.

Scott quickly rolled off Deucalion without answering and started to climb to the top bunk. He paused halfway and looked back at the older man meeting his half-lidded eyes. Scott wanted to say something, but it didn't feel right. "Wake me when we're there," he said instead and continued to his bed. He flopped down and cursed himself.

* * *

They made it to Egypt without incident, but then came the hard part.

"You know Egypt is huge, right?" Kali remarked as they departed the ship.

"I've narrowed it down to a city," Scott threw back, "of the past ten sightings, six have been in Luxor as well as the two most recent claims."

Derek crossed his arms. "What's in Luxor?"

"The remains of the city of Thebes from ancient Egypt," Deucalion replied without hesitation. The whole pack turned to him in silence and the older alpha shrugged. "What? I've been there before."

"You what?" Scott threw up his hands. "And you didn't say anything  _because?_ "

"You wouldn't say what city we were going to, I've only been to Cairo and Luxor, I'm hardly an expert in Egyptian travel."

"When you were last in Luxor, did you sense anything?" Scott pressed excitedly. "Or feel the presence of another wolf? Any odd scents? Anything you can remember? It'll help narrow it down further."

"I—erm." Deucalion quickly put a hand up to forestall Scott's babbling. "I was ten when I went to Luxor."

Scott deflated. "Oh."

"I lived in South Africa for a time, during my childhood," Deucalion continued. "That's why I didn't say anything."

"You grew up in Africa?" Aiden looked up quickly, suddenly interested in the conversation. His eyes darted between Deucalion and Scott. "I always thought you were from England."

"I am. Or rather, I was born there and moved back in my early teens." Both twins opened their mouths, eager to ask the older wolf for more information, but Scott intervened.

"Do you ever remember hearing anything about a white wolf?"

"That's something I certainly would have told you, Alpha," Deucalion answered. "The only thing I remember about a wolf was the jackal, which signified Anubis who protected the dead in their journey to the afterlife. Turns out that the 'jackal' was actually a grey wolf and the distinctive black color Anubis is known for isn't from the grey wolf, but to represent the rotting flesh and the black soil of the Nile valley, thus symbolizing rebirth in death. The only other thing I can recall is that Anubis would perform the measurement of a person's heart after death, determining the worthiness of them to enter the realm of the dead."

Kali snorted and turned away from the pack. "Smartass."

"Just how much do you know about the supernatural world?" Derek asked, as he frowned in suspicion.

"You retained all that information then?" Scott quirked an eyebrow, noticing Deucalion had stiffened at Kali's disrespect and his fangs were bared.

"It—I found it interesting as a child."

"Might be part of why the white wolf chose Egypt to settle down," Scott mused. He tried to imagine Deucalion as a child learning about Anubis and studying grey wolves. "Cute." Scott felt Deucalion jerk, fangs disappearing in his surprise. Scott gave a soft grin and slid his hand over Deucalion's, fingers intertwining for a heartbeat before he moved away. "C'mon, we've got a ways to travel."

They had landed in the port of Alexandria, needing to travel quite a ways south for Luxor. Thankfully it was a simple matter of following the Nile River.

The fallout from Adian's attack was still felt by the entire pack and emotional recovery was slow. Scott couldn't spend a lot of time around the twins, not without snapping and sending them both running in terror. It wasn't even the darkness in him, just the sting of betrayal. The twins developed a new submissive behavior, which as Derek explained, was so the pack would no longer identify them as a threat. It worked in some respect, but Derek seemed the least likely to accept them as pack again constantly giving them his patent murder scowl. Kali, as usual, didn't care too much and treated them the same as before; in which she generally ignored them unless they were needed for a task.

It was apparent that Deucalion was torn up about it. He cared a great deal for both boys and had been willing to sacrifice everything to keep them alive, but treated the betrayal as personal as Scott did. His anger towards Adian didn't abate for several weeks, leaving the twin depressed and whining in apology. Derek and Kali explained it was because Deucalion was Scott's, any assault against his alpha was like an assault on himself and the twins had known that when Adian attacked. That they would attack their alpha, like Deucalion had been attacked once by his own beta, added salt to the wound.

Scott disregarded it until the issue became a problem. While Ethan fully recovered, Adian, though not as seriously injured, deteriorated in health. He didn't eat or sleep and Scott could easily see the signs of depression and guilt. Like he had discovered within his first few weeks of controlling the pack, the twins relied heavily on Deucalion and were useless without him. When Adian's health issues started to become serious, Scott marched over and confronted Deucalion himself.

"If you were willing to sacrifice your life to save them then go over there and make sure they don't die," he fumed and the older man was startled at his passion. "You don't have to forgive them right away, but don't let them think you hate them."

"But they—"

"You're disappointed in them and angry,  _I know_ ," Scott continued, "but it's coming across like hate and kids shouldn't think their parents hate them." He turned on his heel and left.

Okay, maybe he'd made that personal, but whatever horrible life the twins had come from, they clearly looked up to Deucalion like a father and Scott knew a thing or two about rejection from fathers. He angrily pushed away his feelings. The past needed to stay there.

Deucalion seemed to consider his words and did eventually go over to the twins, both overly flustered, apologizing desperately as if this were their only chance. Scott could hear them clearly, even though they were several rooms down. Later when Deucalion came back to his room, the twins' scent all over him, he sat and didn't say anything for a long time.

"Judging from your smell, you let them touch you," Scott commented.

"They both…wanted a hug before I left." The older man paused. "How did you know?"

"Um, because their scent is covering—"

"I meant about their feelings." Deucalion's voice took an odd quality, quiet and unsure. "You were correct, they were convinced I despised them. They perceived  _themselves_  as disowned."

"I mean, you were giving off a  _strong_  vibe." Scott shrugged. "I've seen it several times before with kids and their parents. I—" He paused, memories of his past, private thoughts that he'd never shared before, welled up in his mind. Scott chanced a look up at Deucalion, face drawn tight in concern, thoughts still probably turned inwards towards the twins.

They were supposed to be working on trust, right?

Scott soldiered on. "Stiles went through this whole phase after his mom died and he somehow got it into his head that his father hated him because  _he'd_  been there when she'd died. I— _shit_ —I went through something similar after my dad left."

"You thought your father hated you?" Deucalion's face suddenly snapped up and Scott could feel Deucalion's eyes on him even if he couldn't see them. A sour taste rose in the back of Scott's throat and he looked away, wishing he couldn't remember the sound of his mother crying or the sight of his father walking out the door.

"That's what happens when your father says he's leaving and then never tries to keep in contact with you," he spat, not wishing to reveal more about himself and a part of his life he wanted to forget. "I figured the twins felt something similar."

"I'm not their father."

"They look up to you like that." Deucalion opened his mouth, but quickly closed it as his gaze dropped to the floor. His shoulders shifted, as if trying to adjust to a new weight upon them and he remained quiet the rest of the night.

The next day Scott noticed Adian looked much better, like he'd actually slept and surprisingly, the young man ate with the rest of the pack. As Adian's health improved, so did Ethan's mood. Scott had a problem with them, but he was still their alpha and as such had to look out for the pack's health.

They passed through cities slowly, wanting to avoid notice and appear like regular tourists. Two weeks passed before they made it to Luxor which was just long enough for Scott to notice another new development in the pack. Mainly, how his and Deucalion's relationship was changing, or rather, that it was actually becoming a relationship—or closer to what people expect a relationship to be. Scott fought hard to contain his anger and calm himself, while Deucalion tried to be more open around him. They began to have actual conversations like normal people.

And Deucalion finally started coming  _to_  Scott for sex.

"You enjoy the book?" Deucalion asked one night after hearing Scott chuckle to himself.

"Yeah." Scott wiped at his eyes, looking at the clock and noticing he'd been reading for the past three hours. Deucalion had given him new books to read after he'd left his old collection at their house in Scotland. His favorite was a British novel called  _Good Omens_. "End of the world apocalypse; it's like the same shit I had to deal with in Beacon Hills. Prophecies and monsters, like the world we live in now. The British humor makes it better."

"I thought you might enjoy it." Scott flushed, happy that Deucalion's eyes were currently a milky blue. A warm flicker of affection bubbled in his chest and he put the book down, still grinning.

"You know what's funny? It's your voice I hear when I read the book."

"Truly?" Deucalion sat up in his own bed, face turning towards Scott. "That is...interesting."

"I dunno about interesting, I've always liked your voice." Scott scratched the back of his head, starting to feel uncomfortable with everything he was sharing. He was still new to this; just sitting here and talking with Deucalion. "I—uh, it's late—"

" _Alpha_." Deucalion swung his legs over the side of his bed and sat opposite Scott, rubbing at his wrist, head tilted to the side, neck bared. Scott felt his heart rate jump as Deucalion's shifting scent hit him.

"You...you want—"

" _You_." Although Deucalion seemed to be fully embracing his submissive position, he could still be somewhat commanding. Scott's eyes traveled down his body and saw the man's erection pressing tightly against his slacks and he swallowed, his throat suddenly dry. This was new territory. Still, Scott had never backed down from a challenge before, and this was all he'd ever sought: someone who wanted him.

That was the first night he slept with Deucalion, sharing a bed and staying with him the entire time despite the urge to leave still lurking in his subconscious.

If Scott was being honest with himself, he wasn't quite sure how he felt about the new changes. He and Deucalion had really only ever had a sexual relationship and that had been fairly one-sided with Scott doing all the taking. He'd always known Deucalion had feelings for him, that much was obvious, but he assumed it was more pack-centric 'I am your submissive' type of thing than any real romantic sentiment. After what he put the older wolf through Scott found everything else hard to believe. If anything, Deucalion should hate him, not want to start something. It made Scott uncomfortable to think about and if he tried for too long a headache would blossom and drive everything away with the pain and shadows.

He wanted this—wanted Deucalion, but did he deserve it?

It was one of those days. Scott was in the middle of dealing with an excruciating migraine and he tried to distract himself by thumbing his wolfsbane bullet charm when Derek burst through the door. Deucalion was down at breakfast with the rest of the pack like usual, only Derek had been away the past few mornings, stalking for the white wolf at dawn. He bounded into the room, coated in dust from the city and a large grin plastered across his face. Scott threw a pillow at him for the interruption.

"No, you'll like this," the older boy assured.

Scott stilled. "Did you find him?"

"No." Derek's grin widened until it looked like his face might crack. "He found me."

" _What?_ " Scott shot up from his bed, headache pushed to the side, and pocketed the bullet. "Did he say anything? I-I mean, he just came up to you? That doesn't make any sense—he's been keeping himself a secret for decades but he just came up to you?"

"I know, I was shocked too." Derek ran a hand through his hair. "At first I thought he was going to kill me or something cause, he was in his wolf form and all, but he just kinda twisted and became human, like  _that—_ " Derek snapped his fingers for emphases. "—and started talking to me."

"What did his wolf form look like?" Scott pressed, anxiety building in his chest.

"Like how he is always described." Derek shrugged. "As a white wolf, except he was huge, much larger than an average wolf, larger than even your form. Other than that, he looks exactly like a normal wolf."

"I see." Scott sighed. "Maybe he can explain why my form looks so different."

"I—I didn't mean like that," Derek stumbled over his words, "y-you look fine, Scott."

"Thanks, but no I don't." Scott put his hand up to forestall any further comments from his beta. He took a deep breath and steadied his heartbeat; happiness warred within him against his pragmatic mind and Scott's chest felt like it might burst from the emotion. "So what did he say?"

Derek sat on the bed, still pent up with energy from a successful hunt. Scott joined him, although he noticed his hands had started shaking and clenched them to make it stop. "He asked who I was, why I was looking for him. I guess since he and his pack are the only wolves that live in the entire country, he can always sense when strangers come. Said he's used to wolves being drawn to him and that he accepts all into his pack. I told him about our pack—"

"You stressed that I just wanted to talk, right?" Scott had made it abundantly clear to his pack that they were  _not_  going to recruit the white wolf. Maybe he'd held that delusion at one point, but that's all it had been. Most of all, Scott just wanted information.

"Yeah, I told him that you had questions about your transformation and just wanted to talk, nothing more. He seemed interested and agreed to meet."

"You—that's it? He agreed just like that?" Scott paused and let the words sink in. His ears started buzzing in the silence and his entire body felt hot. He had been sure that negotiations would have to take place or he would have to prove himself somehow before the white wolf would even agree to see him.

Scott blinked, a single thought rushing through him:  _finally_. All the answers were finally within his sight. He could finally fix himself. He could finally  _win_  against this darkness. Scott blinked again and realized that he was clutching his chest a wide grin stretching his face. He was unused to the expression now.

"Like I said, I was shocked too." Derek looked so incredibly proud of himself that Scott couldn't help but grab the other boy in a fierce hug.

"This means a lot to me, Derek," he said and felt the other wolf respond with a similarly fervent embrace. He pulled back after a moment and touched his forehead to Scott's.

"You're my alpha, but also my brother. I'd do anything for you." Scott enjoyed platonic comfort, the emotion chased away the darkness in his mind.

"We need to tell the other's now." Scott stood up and Derek followed. "When did he say to meet?"

"Tonight, at midnight in the Precinct of Amun Re...wherever that is."

* * *

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Last chapter of Paper Moon! So glad to finally be posting this. I wanted to thank everyone who's been reading and commenting, it's meant everything to me. Hopefully this chapter lives up to your expectations, sorry to end on a cliffhanger. XP
> 
> Act 3 is in the works (aka first draft written) but I'm unfortunately losing my beta as she has to go back to school so I'm not sure how long searching for a new one is going to take. So it might be awhile before Act 3 is posted. In the meantime I'll keep writing and hunting for a beta as well as working on side projects.
> 
> Enjoy and let me know what you guys think! (or if you know any awesome betas available)

* * *

Scott thought the Precinct of Amun Re might be hard to find, some little known area that only wolves knew about, but the reality was—

"It's a tourist attraction," Deucalion commented as they stood in the middle of what had once been a great hall, several ancient pillars surrounding them, carvings worn and completely faded in some areas. The sky was a mixture of black, dark blues and deep purples as the stars winked in the distance. It was well past midnight and the warm air was stale as Scott leaned against one of the crumbling pillars, pretending he wasn't nervous. "Are you feeling well?" The older man pressed closer to Scott, almost touching.

"I'm fine," he assured him. "I had convinced myself he was real, but even then there was doubt. To find out not only is he real, but alive and wants to speak to me is a bit overwhelming."

"You two are both special," Deucalion said. "I doubt he's ever seen another true alpha either."

"You think...you think he can help with the darkness in me?" Scott had never spoken to him about the shadows he felt crawl into his mind the night he killed Jennifer in great length before. That action had changed him forever and Scott wondered if he had told Derek about the Nematon ritual if anything would have changed. Deucalion was the only one who knew about his darkness, or seemed to understand Scott's sickness for what it was.

"I..." The older wolf hesitated and Scott couldn't decipher what the other was feeling, his face had gone blank and his voice quiet. "I don't know. Even if he can't, I'll still—I'll always, erm..." It was a bit funny watching Deucalion fumble over words, but it brought back to mind that something was starting between them. Scott's head started pounding again at the mere thought. The young man brought his hands up to rub circles on his temples, although the action threw off Deucalion. "No! W-what I meant was—"

"Hey!" Kali finally called, hands on hips. "This white wolf ever going to show or did the Hale boy make everything up?" Derek promptly started to growl and Scott rolled his eyes. At least until he blinked and a man had appeared behind the she-wolf.

"Kali!" Scott called and sprang up. The woman tensed at his words and whirled around, flinging herself away from the stranger and snarling in alarm.

"Wait!" Derek called out and put himself in front of the man. "This is him!" Scott didn't drop his offensive posture and the rest of the pack drew towards him, looking wary. "I swear, this is him," Derek assured them.

"You weren't joking, Derek," the man finally said, voice a deep baritone. "That young one really is your alpha."

"Derek get back here," Scott called out and his beta ran over, joining the others as Scott walked forward and studied the man in front of him. He was at least a head taller than the younger alpha, raven hair slicked to the side. His eyes were just as dark as Scott's natural ones as well as skin tone, and his build was also lanky but muscular. He physically looked the same age as Deucalion, but then again, wolves didn't really age past their prime. Scott blinked as he recognized his bone structure.

"You're Native American?" Which, wow, great conversation starter between a legendary wolf and himself. Scott tried to backpedal. "Wh-what I meant was, uh, it's just my research never showed that you had been to America."

"I left as soon as I was able and never returned," the man replied and sure, that made sense. Scott wasn't sure why he cared so much about the guy's ethnicity.

"I'm Scott." He stuck his hand out, belatedly realizing the other wolf might have a different way of greeting.

He grasped Scott's hand firmly and shook it. "I don't remember mine. I've gone by so many. For now, the people here call me Akh." He quirked an eyebrow at the blank look Scott gave him and gave a small chuckle. "The Akh is their concept of a soul, and is the closest thing to the western idea of a ghost or spirit."

"They think you're a ghost?" he asked.

Akh nodded. "It's what I let the people of this city believe. Makes it easier for my pack and I." And as if on cue, Scott watched as several people stepped from the shadows, their eyes glowing either gold or blue. He felt his own pack tense. "Most were omegas, wandering without purpose, I gave them a pack again."

"There has to be close to thirty wolves."

Scott was in awe. He'd never seen such a large pack before. Didn't think it was possible to control that many.

"I've been here for close to ninety years." Akh shrugged. "Word spreads that there's a sanctuary for omegas and they flock from every corner of the world. I turn none away. But enough about me, I heard that you need help?"

Scott frowned. "You want to help? Just like that?"

"When you've been alive as long as I have, fighting just isn't that important anymore it's—"

"Tiring." Scott sighed and the older man nodded.

"Indeed." Akh looked towards his pack and waved them over. "Come greet our new guests. Scott's group has traveled a long way."

They swarmed over and Scott had to fight back the instinct to rejoin his pack as they clumped closer together, wary of the wolves pressing against them in greeting, especially when one female ran her hand up Deucalion's arm. He jerked quickly away and Scott let a growl slip from his throat.

"Ah, that one's yours, isn't he?" Akh smiled and the younger man blushed. The white wolf barked a command and the female swiftly pulled back from Deucalion, looking admonished. "Come, we shall talk of your issue." Akh slapped Scott on the shoulder and led him away. He tried to meet Deucalion's eyes, but it was impossible through his glasses and Scott turned away, still anxious.

Akh walked the young alpha away from the pillars towards an open area, passing underneath a statue of, what Scott assumed was a pharaoh, slightly disconcerted when he realized half the statue's face was missing.

"This is Karnak," Akh explained, "a vast mix of decayed temples, chapels, and pylons. Built around 3200 BC. You like it?"

"At night? It's more creepy than anything else," Scott answered honestly, scratching the back of his head. The older man chuckled gently.

"I thought that too, when I first arrived." They stopped next to a couple of smaller pillars and Akh leaned comfortably against one. "So, what is wrong with your transformation? That is what you wish to discuss, yes? This is a rare gift."

"I know," Scott assured him, "I've seen it before. It's...complicated."

"Most are." Akh nodded. "The transformation is different from each wolf, so do not compare yourself to others in this instance."

A thought struck Scott suddenly. "Is—can it be passed down through family? The last wolf I heard of to fully transform; her daughter had a similar, if not complete, ability as well. Although it only manifested after death, according to Derek."

"Possibly. I don't know much about how dominant the trait is. I have never had children so it's hard to say." Akh shrugged, shoulders lose and it told Scott's instincts that he wasn't worried, even alone out here with an unknown alpha.

"It's okay, it was just a thought that popped up." He thought of Laura and Peter's forms, something Derek clearly didn't share. Scott glanced up at Akh and decided to bite the bullet and get the his real question. "Is my wolf form... _wrong?_ "

Akh frowned. "Has it always been such, or a recent development?"

"I wasn't born with the ability," Scott started, "O-or rather, um, I got it after I was first bitten. This was forced on me by another werewolf, although she didn't expect me to become a wolf."

"Interesting. That's very difficult magic to perform. Do you know how it happened?"

"It was an arrow she shot at me," Scott recalled, "it hit me in the chest. It was black and had carvings engraved in it, but when I transformed it disappeared. I looked through dozens of books and scoured the internet but I could never find any mention of something similar."

"I see." Akh's face set and he looked Scott up and down, eyes sharp and seeming to take in every detail. "There is no arrow in mythology that transforms humans to gods or demons. However, an arrow from Artemis' bow could affect a werewolf. Her bow was crafted by moonlight and silver wood—the things tied strongest to werewolf mythology. An arrow of mistletoe carved with the Greek symbol of Lycaon in it shot from this bow _could_ force a transformation. But this is speculation on my part, I've never heard of it actually being done. The bow is real, I've seen it before, but to go that far—"

"I don't think she expected me to turn into a wolf," Scott stressed. "Also... _what?_ How do you know all of this? Most of that was obscure mythology references." Scott's headache came back in full force. He only understood what Akh said because of his own heavy research into the subject.

Akh chuckled. "It's not obscure if you've spent two lifetimes researching mythology like this. Theoretically, that is one plausible way that your transformation could be forced. The arrow would trigger a change, although as with most werewolf transformations there are endless possibilities. As to her surprise, why? You are a wolf, what else would she expect you to transform into?"

"Darkness." Scott sighed. "When I was younger, a druid turned dark and became a darach. She started a spell of sacrifices to obtain more power and took my mother. To save her, my own emissary suggested a ritual where I swap places as my mother's sacrifice to learn the location of the darach, but to do so I had to die. I was warned that I would live with 'darkness around my heart' for the rest of my life. I think she expected me to become that darkness when she shot the arrow."

" _'Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds_ ,'" Akh said and Scott shook his head.

"Nothing that dramatic," he asserted. "I'm not Oppenheimer. Neither my power nor darkness could consume the world—"

"It has _yours_ ," Akh countered and Scott flinched. "If this woman knew of your darkness then she must have believed it consumed you. However wrong she was, I'm not surprised your wolf form is...different. Scott, have you ever heard of a kanima?"

"Y-yes. My friend Jackson became one after he was bitten." And something clicked in Scott's head and he heaved a sigh. "My form reflects my heart and my heart is surrounded by darkness." Of _course_ he would look distorted. Scott ran his hands across his face. "I can't believe I never even considered that."

"Darkness can be rather self-centered," Akh said gently. "That fact that you are fighting is good news, the fact that you transformed into a wolf instead of something worse means you are strong."

"Not strong enough," Scott muttered. "I slip all the time—hurt people I should care about. Can't stand intimacy anymore. The light hurts more and more. That's why I came to you, I need help. There must be _something_ that can be done about this." Scott didn't want to say he was begging, but it was close. "Have you at least seen this before?"

"Oh several times," Akh confirmed. "It doesn't always have to be so dramatic as performing a blood ritual to let darkness into your heart. Ask that wolf of yours, the one you marked."

"Deucalion?" Scott asked. "I-I mean, he was pretty darkside when we first met, but I wouldn't go so far as—"

"You clearly don't know how a demon wolf is made," Akh cut him off and Scott felt his hackles rise.

"Alright, but he's changed since then. If he had darkness in him and was able to beat or suppress it, then can't I?"

"It's true, I sense no malevolence from his aura—"

"You can sense _auras_ now?" Scott's believability was being pushed to its limits.

"—but that is a rare phenomena. I wonder myself how it was accomplished."

"It didn't happen all as once, I think," Scott recalled, trying to remember Deucalion from before: the man who had been his enemy and sought to make Scott his. "I took over the pack by force. We fought and I won. He still fought me, asked me to kill him, refused to submit. I—uh, I forced him to submit." Images played out in his mind. Deucalion's panicked expression, his scent of terror and ecstasy, the way his back arched in pleasure as Scott's teeth had been around him, and finally his screams as Scott violated him echoed like a ghost in his ear. Scott squeezed his eyes shut, teeth clenched as he relived one of his darkest moments. "But," Scott blinked. Another memory came to him. After he had finished, when Deucalion had been sobbing underneath him, Scott had felt something seal in his chest, like the darkness had swelled further inside him. When he had watched Deucalion's eyes that night, it looked like a taint had left them. Scott had just thought it a trick of the light, or his own mind but...

"It was slow," he repeated. "But his most drastic change happened after our first night together when I asserted my dominance. At first I thought it was because I had claimed him, but now...maybe I took more from him than I thought." He'd never considered that Deucalion had been dealing with his own darkness before, from when he'd been attacked and blinded, from whatever ritual he'd performed to become a demon wolf. If he had been fighting voices and violent urges for ten years like Scott had, then his actions in Beacon Hills made much more sense. Violence and desperation to find someone similar, to make someone like himself so he wouldn't be alone.

Scott could understand that so well that it physically hurt. 

He was drawn back to the present by Akh's hum of confusion and Scott snapped his head up. "What about the other wolves? You said you've seen several like me. How did they beat the darkness within them? Or contain it or—"

"Most didn't, Scott," Akh responded sharply and Scott felt his chest twist in fear. "There are some ceremonies that can be performed where a person can enter their soul to fight the darkness inside, but that is only in certain cases. What you did, I-I'm not sure. Was that the first time you let darkness in? What about when you killed your alpha?"

"My alpha?" Scott's mind slammed to a halt.

"The alpha who bit you, was it in malice that you killed him or was he injured or old and it was a gift of mercy?"

"You mean Peter?" Scott blinked. "Derek killed him, twice."

"Then who did you kill for your power?"

"Um." This was awkward. "I-I thought Derek told you. I never killed anyone for my alpha status, I'm like you; a true alpha—a very _twisted_ true alpha."

Akh's face became stone and Scott had no idea what he had said wrong. Was there some rule that said two true alphas couldn't meet? Wouldn't the others have told him that if it was true?

"I'd just like to stress that I am _not_ here for your pack or territory. I don't want to fight." Just in case there were any doubts, Scott wanted to put that out there. "B-but I think the moment you're talking about, of letting darkness in, the first time I felt it was when I killed Jennifer, that's when I accepted who I am now. People thought it wouldn't work, that if I killed her I couldn't become a true alpha because your eyes change color if you kill an innocent person, but Jennifer wasn't innocent. And when I killed her, I became an alpha, but I think I didn't just let the darkness in...I embraced it as well. I—I was confused for a very long time after that, still am, I think. Just tell me, can anything be done? Or is this my life forever? Will I always be fighting the darkness?"

"Yes."

"Wh-what?" Scott froze. Akh looked back at him, eyes dark and cold.

"The darkness cannot be beaten with any ritual or spell. You were consumed without having a chance to ever fight. You retained your true alpha status because she wasn't innocent, but you still took a life, a life fueled by other lives—who _were_ innocent—and her shadows rushed into you because of the door you opened in your heart. You probably unintentionally took your beta's darkness as well when you claimed him, you would have been sensitive at that point to such things. You acted as a beacon for darkness. It has twisted your heart beyond repair."

"I..." So he _had_ taken Deucalion's darkness. Scott wondered if this was what Deucalion had wanted, when he forced him to kill Jennifer. To engulf Scott in so much darkness he could never be pure again, to break him this completely. His chest twisted in pain and he fought back the ugly urge to lash out. "But I'm fighting it, you said that was good."

"Tell me, Scott: have you been tiring more of late? As you fight for more control to calm yourself, do you also find you grow tired quickly and need to sleep often?"

"How did you—"

"It won't last long," Akh assured him. "You will soon be unable to fight the violence inside you and it will consume everything. Your body, your life, your very essence. Nothing will be left of the person you are. Just darkness, like the wolf who shot you proclaimed."

"You mean, I'm dead? I'll die from this?" This was a perfect time to cry, but no tears came forward. Scott fell to his knees. His pack...his pack would watch him die. "Please, there has to be something. _Something_ must be able to remove o-or at least fight this darkness."

"You know, when I was young a wise woman told me my future," Akh commented, seemingly lost in thought. "Told me how I would die. Most people would be terrified to learn that, but it gave me strength. I was never scared of death after that, because I knew what mine would look like and have never seen it. Now I wonder how other people deal with that fear of the unknown, knowing death could come from anywhere. At least I found peace when the moment came."

"I-I don't understand."

Akh finally turned to him. "There's only one way I know that your darkness can be cleansed."

Hope flared in Scott's chest. " _How?_ "

"Death."

It was so sudden. For one moment, Akh was standing in front of him, dry wind ruffling his loose clothes. The next, a gigantic white wolf was upon Scott, sinking his claws into the younger man's chest. Running on pure instinct, Scott tilted his head just far enough so that his neck was spared the same treatment from Akh's jaws. He had just enough time let out half a bark, a desperate warning to his pack, before falling to the floor as blood splashed everywhere. The gashes in his chest were deep, too deep. Scott felt himself cough up more, raising his arm as Akh tried to tear at his throat again, wincing as teeth ripped through muscle.

Scott tried to growl, tried to do something, but Akh's claws were cutting at his body and he couldn't move. He didn't want to die. Scott felt tears prick at his eyes. There was a roar and a body collided with Akh's, throwing him off the young alpha. Scott struggled for breath and looked up, seeing Deucalion tear at the white wolf's throat with his claws in rage, fully transformed into his demon state. He reared his head and gave a long howl, pain and fury wrapped in it's notes. Scott strained to get up, but the pain was overwhelming and he collapsed with a cry.

" _Scott!_ " Deucalion's voice was frantic, he made a motion to help, but a large paw caught him across his shoulder and tossed him aside. Scott squeezed his eyes shut and tried to concentrate. The only way to fight now was to transform. The shifting of his body and organs displaced wounds and left them in a less serious state than when he was human.

He forced himself to block out the sounds of fighting. His pack had to be combating the rest of Akh's wolves, but there were too many. Defeat was inevitable at this rate. Scott felt his skin break and bones alter, his shirt ripped and the pain from his wounds dwindling as strength flowed into his body. His transformation was taking too long and Scott pressed to go faster, feeling his tail grow and whip out, fangs elongating and fur sprout.

A pained cry ripped from Deucalion and brought the young man back to his senses. Scott scrambled up in his new body, the gashes on his chest and arm were still present, but he pushed the pain to the back of his mind. His only thought was to find Deucalion. Scott turned and had just enough time to register Deucalion was on the ground, hands covering his face as he screamed, before Akh leapt on him. Blood splattered on the ground, claws tore at Deucalion's chest and shredded flesh and cloth as the white wolf snapped at his throat with bared fangs.

 _No!_ Scott's body reacted without thought. He flung himself at Akh, biting at his snout before it could close around Deucalion's neck. Scott headbutted the other, making Akh rear back. He used that moment to bowl into the other wolf, teeth tearing at his exposed stomach and tossing him back several feet away. Scott turned, circling back to his fallen pack member, guarding him. He looked down and licked at Deucalion's hands urgently, trying to let him see the damage on his face, as he whimpered.

"It's fine." Deucalion raised one hand and ran it through Scott's fur. "He just slashed out my eyes. Lucky for me, they're already useless. They'll heal." All Scott saw was a long bloody gash across the top of his face. "They'll heal Scott, don't worry. A-are you—" Scott couldn't answer, but he knew Deucalion could smell his blood. The older man grimaced. "You didn't want to fight. You just wanted to talk." Scott whined in agreeing confusion and grabbed Deucalion's shirt with his teeth, trying to drag the other away as he watched Akh scramble up from the ground. As well as his face and chest being slashed at, Scott noticed Deucalion's right leg was close to coming off. He wasn't going to be able to walk for several days...if they survived that is.

"Scott, don't." Deucalion tried to push at his face and Scott dropped him abruptly as Akh lunged at them. The younger alpha threw himself forward and met the charge head on. They clashed; Akh's glossy white fur against Scott's matted dark brown. He snarled, not letting up as Deucalion lay right behind them. He _needed_ to protect his pack. Scott pushed with all his might, slipping as Akh's teeth caught at his mane and hurled him aside. Scott dragged his body up and roared in challenge, relieved to see Akh ignore Deucalion in favor of fighting him. He backed up, closer to where his pack and the others were fighting, trying to lead him as far away from Deucalion as possible.

The white wolf growled in warning and Scott ducked as he swiped out with his claws. They danced back and forth, Scott giving more and more ground, unable to keep up with Akh's speed and power. Scott felt as his own blood splash across his paws, the wounds on chest not healing. In a moment of clarity, he realized what he was doing wrong. Akh barreled into him and the younger wolf skidded across the floor, a high yip of pain escaping him.

Scott fought to his feet, new conviction in his stance. He was doing this all wrong, he was trying to live when it was far too late for that. Scott's injured arm burned and he bared his teeth at Akh. He needed to stop trying to live and start fighting to win, to take Akh down with him. It was the only option left. The rage that was bubbling deep within in, the darkness Scott had been trying to hold back, he let it out and directed everything towards the white wolf. Akh must have sensed the change in Scott as the young wolf charged, screaming at the other with feral brutality.

He tore at everything, unable to control his frenzy; flesh, rock, ground, it didn't matter. The darkness was pouring out of him (or was that his blood?) and Scott let it consume him. If that's what Akh had been afraid of then Scott was happy to confirm that fear. Blood was foaming in his mouth and Scott kept pushing forward, uncaring when he felt Akh's teeth or claws rip at him, so long as he took the other wolf down. True alpha against true alpha. Scott's tactics and fighting style changed, his movements more erratic with less control and more power fueling them. He didn't let instinct guide him, only blind rage that pushed all distractions from his mind. Scott didn't care if Akh could read his movements, could guess where he would attack next, the speed and force of his claws and fangs kept the white wolf unable to form any approach of his own. Scott battled only to win.

Akh howled in alarm and leapt back deep into his pack with wolves surrounding him instantly in defense. Scott screamed at him in rage, unbelieving that he would cower behind his betas.

"Scott..." The alpha turned his head and watched as Derek fell to the ground in exhaustion, deep claw marks raked across his entire back soaking his clothes in blood. Scott's felt his stomach drop as he took in the sight, his fur stood on end as he listened to his brother's heart stutter. The battle fell away for a moment. The rest of the world dimmed and only Derek remained sharp and in focus. Scott fought to ignore his own heart as it hammered against his ribcage. He swallowed, throat dry suddenly, and sprinted over to try and lift the Derek back up.

Scott barked and it tapered off to a growl, a command to get up, but Derek's back was covered in blood and his arms shook as he tried to support himself.

"Too many...wasn't expecting a fight," Derek breathed against Scott's fur, clutching the wolf's back, trying to stay upright. Scott saw Kali and the twins in their combined form, still fighting, but they wouldn't last much longer at this rate.

He and his pack were going to die.

Akh roared at his wolves and they circled Scott and Derek, snapping at them as they edged closer. Scott curled around Derek, trying to protect his beta, snarling. An alpha was supposed to protect his pack. Scott had to defend them. He couldn't...he _had_ to be better than this.

"Scott, I'm sorry," Derek whispered.

Scott panicked and gathered all of the strength he had left with only one thought in mind: _protect_.

His eyes lit red with power, like jewels shining in the sun. His stance widened as Scott took a deep breath, looking past his darkness and beckoning shadows towards something deeper, something more powerful that he had called on once before. It felt like a spiraling wind inside his whole being, building energy and Scott focused on the bright lights in his life. The people who connected him to his humanity.

His mother's eyes and the pride in them when she looked at him, the way they crinkled at the edges and her laugh lines. The feeling of safety and home as she hugged him when he was a child.

The pressure of Allison's hand in his. Her scent as they walked through the forest, skipping an entire day of school and being normal teenagers. _Feeling_ normal for the first time in ages.

The sound of Stiles' jeep and it's distinctive engine as his friend chatted a mile a minute about a subject, a background noise that calmed Scott. The steady presence of his friend's heartbeat.

Deucalion's words to him _'You're not alone,'_ and the sincerity in his voice.

Scott's howl shook the ground with its power, vibrating through the air. The roar of a True Alpha. All of Akh's wolves within a twenty-foot radius of him buckled and fell to the floor, forced back to their human state. Scott kept it up as long as he could, collapsing when he ran out of air. Derek stood up in his place, eyes bright red and glowing, gaining a second wind. Kali and the twins did the same and with most of Akh's wolves changed, at the very least, Scott's pack would get through this.

The whines of Akh's pack filled the air as they inched away from Scott, metaphoric tails tucked between their legs. He staggered to his feet and had just enough time to leap away as the white wolf came crashing down, teeth barred and eyes wild. His growl was a challenge and Scott dredged up the last of his strength and threw himself at the other. His pack would make it, they would survive, now all he had to do was take Akh out and it would be over. His head was light and fuzzy, body almost floating, but Scott supposed it was the blood loss talking.

He dodged Akh's claws and went for his head, tearing at an ear and yelping as Akh's teeth gouged at his neck, tearing through his mane and skin, but missing his vitals. Both wolves fell back, breathing hard. Scott knew he was done, his body was about to give out, he only had one more shot.

Scott stepped forward, his anger exhausted, and reached one more time for the only thought that kept him standing; he had to protect the pack. Even as a beta, being a guardian was the only thing he had ever really been good at. Scott ducked low and barreled at Akh, the other wolf leaping over him and Scott rolled over and skid to a stop, flying into the air to snap at his exposed neck. He didn't know why Akh was attacking him and honestly, he didn't care. Scott had it coming, he had done some terrible things in the past few years.

But he wouldn't allow anyone to fuck with his pack.

Scott's jaws closed around Akh's neck and he bit down with all his might, feeling blood splash around him. They both hit the floor with a thud. The young alpha kept hold of the white wolf's neck until he finally felt the other still, breath coming out in one last sigh. He looked into Akh's eyes, hoping to find an answer to the attack, but the older wolf's eyes had already glazed over, seeming at peace and Scott realized he'd never know. Didn't matter, he could live with that...or rather...

A whine slipped from Scott's mouth as his legs buckled and he dropped to the floor, bone tired and knowing he didn't have long. He felt his eyes shutter closed—

"Scott!" It was the twins, having separated and halved their wounds. Ethan was limping over to him. "I-I mean, Alpha!"

 _Did we win?_ Scott put the question in his huff and Ethan glanced around.

"There were only a few left, they ran when their leader fell, w-we let them go. Was that ok?" Scott nodded. "Kali and Derek passed out, they're covered in blood, Alpha. A-are you—" His eyes traveled over Scott's body and he watched the twin come to the same conclusion he had. " _No_..."

Something tugged at Scott's heart and he tried to get up. His pack could still die at this rate, they needed help. Dying could wait until after that. Scott bowed his head and tried to think of a memory.

He's in an elevator at the hospital, anxious to talk to Isaac, or at least see him. He had hoped all this supernatural stuff would stop popping up, he _just_ got his life back on track. As the door started to close a metal stick jammed its way in the middle and the boy jumped before sighing as an older man opened the door and stepped inside. Scott swallowed his annoyance when he realized the man was blind.

"Would you hit the button for the second floor, please?" Scott's hands had become sweaty but he nodded, belatedly realizing how useless an action like that was, and pressed the button again.

"Yeah."

"Thank you." Afterwards, there was an awkward silence. The man was his height with bronze hair swept to the side and an angular face. Something about his scent drew Scott's interest and he quickly turned away, again realizing he didn't need to. The door opened and Scott had to keep himself from running out, startling when a hand dropped onto his shoulder, sending a jolt down his spine. "If you wouldn't mind?" the man asked without really asking, his voice heavy with a British accent. Scott sighed and slumped his shoulders, too polite to say no. The hand that gripped him was warm and strong; he ignored the tingle in his stomach and marched forward.

Scott gasped as he snapped out of it. Usually reliving a memory wasn't that intense. Strong hands grasped his arms—his human arms—and Ethan pulled him up.

Ethan's eyes widened. "Your body." Scott forced himself not to look at his chest. The last thing he needed was to go into shock.

"Any of my clothes make it?" he asked and started to walk over, shaking the twin off. His legs, compared to the rest of him, were fine. Or at least would last a little longer before giving out. Miraculously his jeans had survived the transformation and Scott pulled them on slowly, wincing from the pain. Ethan and Aiden  came up to him, looking pale and scared. Aiden  sported a large gash across his chin and forehead, trying to blink out the blood.

"Grab Kali and Derek," Scott ordered the two, "I'll get Deucalion. There was an Urgent Care center near our hotel. I'll try to patch everyone up best I can. I-I'm good with dogs." He tried to joke but it fell flat and forced.

"Wh-what about you?" Aiden asked.

" _Go,_ " Scott growled and the twins rushed off. Ethan slung Derek over his shoulders while Aiden picked Kali up bridal style. Scott shuffled over to Deucalion as his sides started to burn. The man was still breathing, though it was labored. Blood trickled from his face and leg, the healing slow as an alpha gave him the wounds. He stirred as Scott grabbed his waist and pushed his upper body over his shoulder. "Don't move," Scott ordered and he felt the older wolf relax and sleep again.

"The sun's going to rise in a few hours," Aiden  warned him.

"We'll be gone by then, c'mon." And the three slowly made their way out of the ruins and towards the city. Scott had them keep to the shadows to avoid notice. They broke through the back door of the urgent care center. The two employees jumped up in alarm and rushed forward. "Wipe their memories." Scott nodded to Ethan and the older boy placed Derek down before sinking his claws into the back of the employee's necks, rendering them unconscious.

"They'll wake up thinking a burglary happened," Ethan stated and Scott made his way to the operating tables and placed Deucalion on one, the twins following suit.

"I'm going to need any disinfectant you can find, scent for alcohol if you're unsure," Scott began ordering as he went to a sink and started washing his blood-covered hands. It only partially helped as his own wounds weren't healing and the gashes on his arms still bled, but it was the best he could do. "I'm going to try and help the healing process by stitching and wrapping up their wounds."

"We could try and take away some of their pain," Aiden offered as he gave Scott several bottles of rubbing alcohol.

"You'd die in your conditions," Scott said. "Or at the very least lose your alpha status. If I could..." He placed a hand on Deucalion's leg and for old time's sake reached out for his pain, jolting back when his veins ran black.

"What—" Aiden's eyes went wide.

"I-I didn't think a demon wolf could do that." Ethan glanced quickly from Scott's hand to Deucalion.

"He's _not_ a demon wolf." Aiden's eyes shined with hope and Scott didn't want to believe it.

"But the darkness in me..." He trailed off. Why was he arguing? This only helped matters. Scott reached back to Deucalion and gasped as the pain hit him. He took as much as he dared, relieved to see the bleeding slow, then stop. "Hand me a needle and some thread." Ethan passed over the supplies and Scott quickly went to work, going on to autopilot; he could do this in his sleep. He'd always been good at healing.

When Scott finished with the leg, he moved to Deucalion's chest and started the stitching, taking a bit more of the man's pain with him. He instructed the twins to wrap his wounds in gauze, including his eyes, which unfortunately, no one could do much about. He went to Derek next and looked over his friend's back then cleaned it with alcohol and reached for his pain.

"Alpha...your _blood_." Ethan's voice was urgent.

"Yeah, I'm not healing, so what?" Scott shrugged and immediately regretted it.

"No, not that," Aiden agreed and Scott looked down finally. His chest was horrendous, the gouges going so deep as to show his splintered ribs and lung tissue, but what really got him was that his blood had turned black. Scott felt faint and forced himself not to pass out, leaning hard against the table.

"You're taking too much in!" Ethan insisted.

"It doesn't matter." Scott sighed and met his beta's stare. "In the end, it doesn't matter." He went back to healing his pack, moving on to Kali and looking over her badly shredded legs. "All those high kicks," he muttered and barely flinched as his veins blackened. In some way, it felt like a poison was leaving his body, the more he healed. His anger was exhausted from battle and now his darkness couldn't compete with the bittersweet sting of taking pain instead of giving. The more he restored his pack, the lighter he felt, the less control the darkness had.

Scott turned to the twins last and they both backed away, shaking their heads.

"Alpha, you can't take anymore," Ethan pleaded, "you look like you're dying."

"I am, Ethan." The peace Scott felt was liberating. Maybe there was a reason Akh looked that way when he died. He reached out and placed a hand on both boys' chests. "And it's alright. So long as the rest of the pack makes it." So much pain was already heaped upon him, Scott could take a little more.

"A pack _needs_ an alpha." Aiden's words were harsh, but his face was torn. The cuts along his face slowly healed and Scott pulled back, nearly collapsing.

"And you still have one." He nodded and made his way to Deucalion, almost floating on air, Scott couldn't feel his feet any longer. "He can take care of the pack again." The older wolf's face was swathed in bandages, his eyes completely covered and as an afterthought, Scott placed his hand on the other's face and gave everything he had left to the man's eyes. At least when Deucalion woke up he'd be able to use his wolf vision to move around. Scott gasped as his body gave out and tumbled to the floor.

He felt hollow, but also light. The weight that had settled around him was gone. The darkness no longer tainted his thoughts. The urge to hurt replaced with the need to heal and protect. If only it wasn't too late.

Deucalion's arm had slipped off the table when Scott had collapsed, draped in front of the teen as he sat below, breaths shallow and pained. He'd never really noticed the older man's hands before, but he liked them now that he had the chance. Long, graceful fingers a bit at odds with his compact and muscular body, the tips calloused from years of reading brail. Yeah, Scott liked them. As his vision clouded over he imagined them tracing his face.

* * *

 


End file.
